Karma
by Tori Masen-Cullen
Summary: Billionaire CEO Edward Cullen knew quiet Pre-K teacher Bella Swan in H/S but age difference and his choice of lifestyle kept him from pursuing her. Bella comes back into his live twelve years later under extreme circumstances will he get his chance?
1. Chapter 1

**Hello again and welcome to my new story Karma. This is something a little different for me but I'm giving it a go please let me know what you think. a huge WARNING comes with this story, it contains both BDSM and child abuse (not graphic just the after effects)**

**I have no training what so ever in BDSM so please do not try any of what I say at home, I just enjoy reading other stories like this.**

**SM owns these characters, I'm just playing with them. Please leave a review to let me know what you think.**

**Vik**

**x**

BPOV

Chapter 1

June 1998

The shallow breaths I was taking were starting to burn my lungs and behind tightly closed lids, my eyes were prickling with the tears that I promised myself I wouldn't shed today. I could feel the gravel that was scattered across the parking lot cutting into the palm of my hands and hear the snickering and taunting from my so called peers.

The sun was shining this morning when I pulled myself out of bed – it still is – and I unfortunately mistook this as an omen that today would be a good day and that I would get through it without incident and without drawing unwanted attention to myself. . .I couldn't have been more wrong, as there I was, at seven thirty AM on my hands and knees in the parking lot of Forks High School, the content of my backpack sprawled across the ground in front of me, after tripping over a rock that was suddenly thrown in my path from the direction of the Bitch Brigade, I didn't see who threw it, it could have been any of them, but if I had to guess, I would say that it was either Tanya Denali or Lauren Mallory, the Queen Bitch and her Lady in Waiting – and when I say _lady _what I mean is _whore _– but the truth of the matter is that it could have been any of their minions, they were all the same.

"Oh look it _doesn't_ bounce, looks like you were right after all, Jess," Tanya laughed. _I will not cry, I will not cry, _I demanded as I steeled myself, preparing to open my eyes, peel myself off the floor and pretend this never happened – not that anyone in the God-forsaken place would let me forget.

"That's _enough,_ Tanya," a voice like velvet covered titanium rang across the lot, a voice that demanded attention from anyone and everyone, a voice that had the potential to send my heart into overdrive or stop it in its tracks, a voice that was doing noting for my current breathing problem. Why oh why did _he_ have to arrive at school at this exact time? Why couldn't I get though this one day without humiliating myself in front of him? The silence that followed his demand was eerie, the only sounds were the crunching of the loose gravel beneath _his _feet and a muttered apology from Tanya, she wasn't saying sorry to me, no, she was saying sorry to _him_ for what I have no idea!

I felt like I had been on the ground for hours, but I knew that it had been mere seconds and I also knew that I couldn't put of the inevitable any longer, I would have to stand and face my tormenters and now that _he_ was here it could go one of two ways, either all eyes would be on him or they would be on me. I was praying for the former and that I would be able to pull myself up and sneak off to class, well I _was_ until I opened my eyes to see long masculine fingers held out before me.

"Here let me help you up, Isabella," if it had been any other voice, I would have ignored the offering and clambered to my feet all by myself, knowing that it would be some kind of sick joke and that I would somehow end up right back on my ass – not that I was on my ass right now, no my fat ass was stuck up in the air for all to see – but this was _his_ voice and if I knew anything at all, it was that above all else I could trust this voice, it had been my saving grace on more than one occasion.

As elegantly as possible – for someone my size and with my lack of finesse – I reached out and took hold of his strong hand, letting him aid my removal from the cold wet ground.

"Thank you, Edward," I whispered as I righted myself. Edward had already collected my books and was now crouched on the ground placing them back into my bag.

"You're welcome, Isabella and please, try to not let her get to you, you're a bigger person then she is," a giggle came from somewhere among the Bitch Brigade at the comment of me being the 'bigger person', but one look from Edward stopped the laughter short. I could only be grateful that I had never been on the receiving end of his menacing glare as it was truly terrifying and I mean shivers-down-your-spine,Michael Myers meets Freddie Kruger kind of terrifying all rolled into one, I could almost hear _Tubular Bells _playing somewhere in the background. Edward's eyes snapped to mine and softened as I met them for the first time today. "Are you okay?" He asked as he passed me my bag and ran his hand through is gorgeous bronze hair, I took it from him gratefully and smiled.

"I'm okay, thanks, it was just an accident," I muttered lowering my eyes, why I was lying for them I had no idea. I felt a warm finger under my chin and my face was pulled up to look at Edward once again, he studied me, his rich green eyes staring into my boring brown ones, looking for something I'm sure, whether he found it or not is a mystery as he just gave me a small smile a nod of his head and he turned and strode over towards Tanya. I stared after him for a moment, unable to pull my eyes away from the retreating form of the most beautiful man in existence. The noise around me suddenly rose back to normal volume and everyone that had been frozen when Edward Cullen arrived on the scene became suddenly animated again. I chanced a quick glance in his direction, Tanya was stood before him, her head bowed, he had one hand on her hip and one on her shoulder and he was whispering something in her ear and by the look on her face, it wasn't sweet nothings. I sighed, shook my head and made my way into the school building, thankful that at least one thing had gone my way this morning – my tears hadn't fallen.

EPOV

I was seething, as I made my way across the lot towards Tanya, the girl can _not_ follow a simple fucking order, I've lost count of the number of times I've told her to leave Isabella the _hell_ alone, but does she listen? Dose she fuck! The jealous harpy comes out to play each and every time she sees Isabella and with that, the claws come out. Isabella Swan is twice the girl that Tanya Danali and any of her minions could ever be, and I don't mean because of her size, yes I will admit that she is bigger then the average girl but it takes nothing away from her beauty. Aside from being stunningly beautiful, Isabella is selfless, she is sweet and kind and generous and forgiving and just. . .good!

Isabella was the first person I met when I moved here from Seattle with my Mom, Esme, two years ago when she was desperate to get away from the hustle and bustle of the city. Unfortunately my dad couldn't commit to a four house commute to the office everyday so only comes home at weekends or else my mom goes to Seattle to be with him. I can tell it's hard on them, they are as in love with each other as much, if not more so, then they were on their wedding day, but my dad is Dr Carlisle Cullen, multi-billionair CEO of Cullen pharmaceuticals, so it's kind of important that he goes to work everyday. It wont be forever anyway, he plans to retire as soon as I'm deemed fit to take over the helm.

Isabella was just thirteen at the time, we'd moved over the summer and as my little sister Alice had convinced my Mom and Dad to send her to school in Paris I was climbing the walls. I'd just got my licence so decided to go out for a drive and ended up at the beach in La Push just in time to see the figure of a young girl running towards the edge of the cliff that over looked the ocean, being chased by a huge wolf. The girl didn't even stop to think as she reached the edge of the cliff, no, she just threw her arms up in the air and jumped. I've never moved so fast in my life, I was out of the car, across the beach and diving into the icy water just seconds after she shot through the surface. The fact that she is here today tells you that my heroic rescue attempt was successful, and we spent a lot of time after that getting to know each other. At the end of summer she went back to middle school and I started my sophmore year at Forks High.

So why am I dating Tanya Denali instead of Isabella Swan? Well aside from the fact that she is only a sophmore and I'm a senior, it's simple, I'm _not _good, I am as far away from good as you can possibly get and if I am ever to try and redeem myself, then leaving Isabella to live a long and happy life without the likes of me screwing her over – literally as well as figuratively – is the way to go about it. I don't deserve someone like Isabella Swan in my life, I deserve the likes of Tanya Denali and if I'm honest she deserves the likes of me.

"What the fuck, Tanya?" I demanded in a hiss as I reach her side. Lauren, Jessica and the rest of her cronies, wisely took a step back as I pulled Tanya roughly by the hip towards me, gripping onto her shoulder to steady her as she stumbled.

"I didn't do anything," she insisted, but she lowered her eyes, bowing her head and I knew instantly that she was lying and regardless of whether she threw the fucking rock or not, she was still encouraging it and taunting Isabella.

"I have to disagree with you there, Tanya I think that you and I both know that you were once again the instigator of that little show and I'll tell you for the last time. Leave. Isabella. The. _Fuck. _Alone!" I hissed directly in her ear. "This won't go without punishment," I reminded her "My Mom is in Seattle this weekend so be at mine at seven tonight and if you value the skin on your ass then I suggest that you refrain from speaking to me for the rest of the day, is that understood?" It's a rhetorical question that at the most required a head nod from Tanya but like I said, she just can't follow fucking orders.

"Yes, sir" she whispered, she also knew better then to call me that in public, nobody needs to know about our little arrangement. Luckily no-one was close enough to us to hear, but that's beside the point.

"Get out of my face, Tanya," I demanded, pinching the bridge of my nose. She turned and scurried off, tossing her strawberry blonde hair over her shoulder and leaving me fighting for control of my anger in the middle of the schools fucking parking lot. I really needed her to follow through today and do as she's told, I need to calm the fuck down before tonight, I've told her she will be punished so I can't go back on my word, but I also can't punish her while I'm so pissed off.

"You okay, man?" If I was grateful to see anyone right now, it was Jasper Whitlock. "I honestly don't know how you put up with her, you do realise that she hasn't got a submissive bone in her body? It's you she want's and she'll do just about anything to keep you, Isabella on the other hand..."

"Not going there, Jazz," I interrupted quickly, the last thing I needed to hear from him now was how he though that one day – obviously when she's no longer jail-bate – Isabella will make a great submissive.

Like me, Jasper is a Dom, it was actually Jasper that introduced me to the scene about a year ago. After my third failed attempt to get off having sex, I drunkenly admitted to Jazz that I though something was wrong with me. Jazz simply told me not to worry and dragged my seventeen year old ass off to Seattle to meet his older brother Peter the following weekend. I got off in the shower that night replaying images of Peter spanking a bound and gagged Charlotte on his whipping bench.

Peter has been my mentor ever since and I've spent more time on my knees in his playroom with him and Jaspers mentor, Maria than I care to think about. It was three months ago at one of Peters play parties that I inadvertently found myself bound to Tanya Denali – pun intended.

Jasper and I had been heading up to Seattle almost every weekend for training. Depending on the session I was either playing submissive for Peter and Maria or practising being Dom on Kate, a trained sub that Peter knows from the clubs he attended. We'd been training for eight months when Peter had his first play party and I was told that I would be coming in Dom mode and would be doing my first public scene with Kate. The night was great and I was still buzzing from it the following Monday when I pulled into the school parking lot, well I was before Tanya climbed into the passenger seat of my car and preceded to show me the video footage that she had taken of me – binding, flogging and fucking Kate's mouth – from the tree outside Peter and Charlotte's house.

_"What do you want Tanya?" This couldn't be fucking happening, why out of everyone does it have to be Tanya Fucking Denali that finds out about my lifestyle. _

_ "You, Edward," she shrugged putting her camcorder back in her purse._

_ "No can do, Tanya, for two reasons, the first being that I really don't like you, the second being that you don't fit into my world and I don't fit into yours" There was no way in hell I was getting involved with Tanya._

_ "You can and you will or else I have a copies of this at home, ready to be sent out to every newspaper in the state showing them the truth about Carlisle Cullen's son, the hire to Cullen Pharmaceuticals" Fucking Jesus Christ!_

So that was how I ended up three months ago with Tanya Denali as my submissive and a list as long as my arm of hard limits – as you can imagine it's not going well, but looking on the bright side, today is my last day of high school as tomorrow is graduation and at the end of summer I am heading off to Dartmouth with the only copy of that tape while Tanya heads to Alaska – life doesn't get better than that – oh wait yes it does, Alice is coming home to start her Junior year here in Forks and she just can't wait to meet Isabella.

BPOV

"Are you sure about this?" My Dad asked as he placed my last suitcase in the trunk of the cruiser.

"I'm possessive, you and Sue will have a great time travelling and it will be nice to spend time with Renee. Plus it's sunny in Florida, you never know I might just get a tan" I laughed. To be honest this arrangement was perfect for both me and my Dad. Dad and Sue had married a couple of months ago and were planning on travelling for the next six months as their honeymoon. I hadn't seen my Mom since last summer when I travelled to Jacksonville to spend a week with her and her husband Phil. Now I was making a permanent move, I just couldn't take the bullying and the ridicule here any longer and with Edward going off to University in the fall I really felt that I would be going through it all alone and I just couldn't do that. Don't get me wrong Edward and I don't hang out – well apart from that first summer – but he is the only one that stops people from doing stuff to me, well him and his friend Jasper Whitlock, and so yeah I'm off to Florida to live with my Mom for the first time since she left when I was nine and hope that my Junior year will be better there than it ever could have been here.


	2. Chapter 2

**Welcome to chapter 2. I have this chapter contains the child abuse, and the next the aftermath of it. I have stared where it begins, I will say that if you skip it you will miss some of the story line.**

BPOV

Chapter 2

March 2010

"_If anyone knows their location please contact us on Seattle 555 0708 or call your local police department" _I closed my eyes, willing the tears away as I continued to wipe the bar down, stories like the one playing on the TV, always bring a tear to my eyes, but this one is almost tearing my hear in two. I've watched this broadcast on nearly every news program for the past three weeks and it doesn't get any easier. Twelve years ago I knew and loved the man gripping the hands of his mother and sister and begging on those broadcasts for his girlfriend to bring his two children home. Seeing self-assured, confident, domineering Edward Cullen close to tears on national television will melt the hardest of hearts.

Apparently just days after giving birth to their son, Tanya Denali walked out of the hospital, collected their three year old daughter from daycare and disappeared into thin air. You'd think with the amount of money that the Cullen's have they would have found Tanya by now, but no. I guess this just proves that money can't buy you happiness.

I was honestly shocked the first time the picture of Tanya and a gorgeous bronzed haired little girl flashed up on the screen. Edward never seemed to like Tanya much in high school and I know that it shocked just about everyone when he started dating her a few months before he graduated. I may not have fit in at Forks High, but that doesn't mean that I didn't know what was going on. One thing I did know – which only added to the Edward/Tanya confusion – was that Edward Cullen was a Dom. A friend of mine, Jacob Black had found out about his lifestyle and my obsession over him and was trying to keep me away, not that Edward Cullen would ever look at me as anything other than the little girl he spent a summer with. At first – being only fifteen – I had no idea what a Dom was, once I knew I was appalled, as time went on I was intrigued and now. . .well lets just say that I'm perpetually horny and have been left constantly unsatisfied by any sexual encounter I've had. I tried to encourage my boyfriend – well ex-boyfriend – Riley to be more adventurous in bed but to no avail. I have considered joining a BDSM club but I just can't do that alone, even striking up conversation with a Dom online is virtually impossible for me, and the one time I did pluck up the courage to do so – after a couple of glasses of wine of course – as soon as he started asking me questions about what I liked and what I wanted I froze and logged off, never to venture online again.

So anyway, Edward Cullen is a Dom and Tanya Denali is the least likely sub I've ever met. But whatever was going on between those two at high school, it seems to have lasted twelve years and now his girlfriend_ –_ yes _girlfriend _not _wife – _of twelve years has disappeared with his children.

"You almost done, Bella?" Jack asked wandering into the bar from the kitchen. Jack owned _Twilight _the bar I've worked at since being made redundant from my position as a pre-k teacher three months ago. Tonight was my last shift, I was moving back to Seattle next week after being offered a position as nursery manager at non other than Cullen Pharmaceuticals – small world I know. I'd been in Florida since I left Forks at the end of my sophmore year. It was great living with my Mom and Phil, but I missed my Dad and am looking forward to being closer to him again. I'd attended university here, living at home all three years of my degree in childhood education, to save additional loans. I'd waited tables at _Twilight _at the time, so when I lost my job, Jack was the first person I came too see.

"Just finishing up, I'm dead on my feet, it was busy tonight," I replied as I shut off the lights that lit up the spirits on the glass shelves behind the bar.

"Well you get off home, kiddo, I can finish up here,"

"Are you sure?" I asked, not wanting to leave him to do too much, not that there was much left to do anyway.

"Of course, here's your tips for the night and your last check," Jack said, handing me two little brown envelopes.

"Thanks, Jack, I really can't tell you how grateful I am for you helping me out like you did," Jack was one of the few people that I was going to miss when I moved to Seattle.

"Anytime, honey, you will always have a job here, you know that," I did know that and I would be forever indebted to Jack.

"I'm gonna miss you, old man," I laughed lightly mock punching him in the arm. I was trying to lighten the mood, after seeing the images of Edward and leaving this bar for this last time, I was feeling a little too emotional.

"You too, kiddo," Jack said ruffling my hair. I think he knew how close to tears I was. I smiled at him, grabbed my coat and bag from beneath the bar and turned to leave.

"See ya' around, Jack" I smiled.

"See ya around, kid" I swallowed the lump in my throat and walked out of the bar.

I didn't have a car, _Twilight_ was only a couple of blocks from my apartment and it was warm enough here to walk or catch the bus, a car was an expense I didn't need. It was something that I was going to have to think about when I moved to Seattle though. The daycare centre that I was going to work in was on the ground floor of the Cullen Pharmaceuticals building, which was just outside of town. The daycare wasn't owned by Cullen Pharmaceuticals, it was a company called Pitter Patter that had won the tender for the building, I'd interviewed for the position here in one of their other daycare centres. When I took the job, I had no idea that the centre was located within the Cullen building but when I found out, the thought of maybe seeing Edward again caused a swarm of butterflies to take off in the pit of my stomach, I had no idea at the time whether he was married or not, but his status came to light the first time I saw the plea for Tanya to bring his children home. Now all I wanted to do was get on a plane to Seattle and pull Edward out of the water, just like he did me when I was thirteen.

I pulled my jacket tighter around me, although it was warm here in Florida, the nights can get a little chilly and as it's now eleven thirty the warmth from the sunny day has slowly faded.

**(starts here) **"Just get in the fucking car, Elizabeth" I jumped startled as the sudden high pitched screech filled the otherwise peaceful night, I looked around to see where it had come from but couldn't see anything obvious in the dark. It was only Wednesday and it's normally Friday nights that all hell brakes loose and someone that has had far too much to drink is being dragged home kicking and screaming. I laughed to myself – someone is gonna have a nasty hangover for work tomorrow. Well that was until I heard the distinct sound of a baby crying accompanied by the sobbing of a child.

"P-please, M-momma I left B-barnacle inside" stuttered a tiny voice, the baby continued crying. I looked around again trying to see where the noise was coming from, not that it was any of my business, Mothers have these issues with there kids everyday, I just didn't like the language the woman had used towards a child and I suppose I'm just in-tuned to it because of my job and because it's not something that normally happens at eleven thirty at night.

"Don't call me that, and get in the fucking car NOW, Elizabeth," have you ever truly felt sick to the stomach by someone else's actions? Well that's how I felt and my body automatically started heading in the direction that the shouting and screaming was coming from.

"T-t-tanya, I want m-mmy D-d-daddy" the little voice begged. I couldn't breathe, I took off running and rounded the corner just in time to see a dark haired woman backhand the tiny girl across the face. The girl flew across the parking lot that they were standing in, landing in a heap on the ground.

"Hey," I shouted, adrenaline was pumping through my blood steam, deep inside I knew who this was and she was going to get more than a piece of my mind. The woman's head shot around in my direction and dark hair or not I would know those, steel grey eyes anywhere – it was Tanya Fucking Denali. I'd never been more grateful that I had lost seventy pounds after leaving Forks and spent all my free time in the gym, but no matter how fast I had become, before I could reach them Tanya had climbed into a black BMW SUV and speed out of the parking lot leaving one screaming and one deathly silent child behind her. I had found Edward Cullen's children, I was sure of it and I was. . .well I don't know what I was feeling.

Then panic set in, at least one of them was hurt, I had seen it happen and I had never felt so helpless, the baby was still screaming at the top of his lungs, nestled in a car seat in just a baby vest and no blanket and the girl was sprawled out on the ground five feet away from him, wearing not much more. I quickly took off my jacket and wrapped it around the baby picked up the car seat and moved it next to where the little girl – Elizabeth, or Lizzy as Edward and his family had been calling her – lay on the ground, I crouched down on the floor next to her.

"Lizzy, can you hear me, sweetheart?" I asked reaching under her chin to check for a pulse, it was there and it was strong but she was still unresponsive, I quickly checked to see if she was breathing, pulled my sweater off and tucked it around her tiny body. I Didn't want to move her but I knew that I had to make sure she wasn't bleeding where she hit her head on the ground so I slid my hand under the back of her head gently and as soon as my fingers came into contact with wet hair, I knew that my hope was in vain. The only thing I could think to use at this point was a sock, as I slid my tennis shoes off and pulled my socks off, thanking God I'd only had them on for the last twenty minutes or so, since we closed the bar. I doubled them over and reached under her head to apply pressure to the wound and fished my phone out of my handbag and called 911.

"911, what's your emergency?" came a sweet voice from over the phone.

"Um, hi my name is Bella Swan and I've just witnessed an assault on a young child by what I believe to be her mother, the mother left but the child is unconscious on the ground with a head injury that's bleeding quite a lot." I rushed out, I really had no idea what to say, I was still working off adrenaline.

"Okay, first can you give me your location so we can get the paramedics en-route?" she asked

"Yeah, I'm in the parking lot of the Thriftway on the corner of Thirty Second and Main."

"Can you check to see if the child has a pulse and that they are breathing?" the operator asked.

"Yeah I already have, there both there and they seems strong, it's where she hit her head when her mother backhanded her across the face that I'm worried about" I spat, venting my frustration, I heard the operators breath catch.

"Okay can you find something to apply pressure to the wound?" The first aid training that I had to go through for my degree was paying off.

"Already have"

"Good job, is that your baby I can hear?"

"No, it's the girls little brother, I have reason to believe that they are the Cullen children." I confessed.

"Is the baby harmed in anyway?" She asked worriedly, I could hear her tapping away on the computer keys.

"He doesn't seem to be, but I've not got him out of his car seat, the only thing is that he is very tiny and he is only wearing a baby vest." I told her.

"Okay, how would you feel about sharing some body heat with the little guy" she asked.

"Sure anything, what do I need to do?" At this point I was running a finger along Lizzy's cheek trying to get a response, I knew she was still breathing, I could see her chest rising and falling and feel the air moving in and out of her little button nose.

"I need you to take him out of his seat and put him inside your top giving him as much skin to skin contact as your can without undressing him." she instructed. I knew about sharing body heat – survival 101 when I used to go camping with my Dad. I quickly put my phone on speaker and placed it on the ground before gently removing my hand from the back of Lizzy's head, making sure that her body weight was applying natural pressure against the socks to stop the bleeding. Uncovering the tiny, tiny boy – Masen is his name according to the news reports – I put my jacket back on, unclipped his seatbelt, gently scoped him up into my arms and fed his tiny body up under the vest top I was wearing, holding his cold body against my warm chest and wrapping my jacket tightly around us both. He was rooting like crazy, weighed next to nothing and his cry's continued.

"Okay, done" I told the operator as I sat on the ground next to Lizzy to continue applying pressure with my free hand.

"The paramedics will be with you in five minutes, do you need me to stay on the line?" She offered.

"No, that's fine, I'll call back if there is a problem."

I'd only just hung up the phone when the sirens and flashing blue lights of an ambulance and a police car rounded the corner. The paramedics pulled up first and one ran in our direction as the other reached into the back of the ambulance and pulled out a bag.

"Ma'am, my name is Adam and this is my colleague Melissa, could you tell us what happened." So I spent the next couple of minutes going over what I had seen with the two paramedics. Lizzy was lifted off the floor on to a stretcher and I was allowed to climb in the back of the ambulance with Masen still firmly nestled against my chest. The police officers were following us to the hospital and I would have to answer questions there. **(ends here)**

EPOV

I had hardly slept for more than an hour at a time in the past three weeks. The night before I was going to the hospital to collect Tanya and Masen to bring my son home was the last time I had slept and it was a beautiful nights sleep. Tanya would never let Lizzy in either of our beds, she insisted that she needed to sleep alone, so on the nights that she was at the hospital, I had climbed into my bed with Lizzy lying on my chest at eight o'clock each night and had the best nights sleep of my life. Lizzy and now Masen – not that I'd had a chance to get to know my son – were the bright spots in my dark life. After leaving high school and Tanya Fucking Denali behind, I moved to New Hampshire to get my degree's in business and pharmaceuticals. Four years in university and two years in graduate school saw me back in Seattle and ready to learn the business. I had been working under my father for a year and my position as CEO was just about to go before the board of directors when Tanya blew back into my life like a fucking tornado.

She had a copy of the tape that she had given to me before I left to go to Dartmouth and she was once again threatening to release it to the media. The whole future of Cullen Pharmaceuticals was hanging in the balance and the bitch had me by the balls. With age comes knowledge though, so we negotiated – with my lawyer, Jasper Whitlock present – and came up with a one year deal. I would train her to be a submissive and in return she would hand over all of the copies of the tape and sign a non-disclosure agreement – perfect, right? Yeah, until she comes to you six months into the deal and tells you that she's pregnant.

The arrangement that Tanya and I had was purely business as far as was concerned. She slept in the submissive's bedroom, prepared and served my meals at weekends when my house keeper Mrs Cope was with her grandchildren and thankfully only spoke when spoken too. . .well most of the time anyway. At this point I hadn't been without a sub in the eight years I had been a Dom. I'd had three collard subs, one of which I had just had to end my arrangement with so that I could 'train' Tanya. I wasn't stupid, I knew that Tanya had no desire to be a submissive, she was no better at it than she was in high school, safe wording all the fucking time, no whips, no canes, no paddle, no anal, no deep throating, no gagging. I had to reach the furthest point in my imagination to be able to get it up, even when she was bend over the whipping bench with a nice pink ass – that had been slapped not whipped obviously – So in the six months that I was training her I fucked her all of four times and always with a condom and that was only because the need became too much and jacking off was giving me Carpel Tunnel. Tanya Denali wanted me – yes, but what she wanted more was the Cullen fortune, she could have sold us the tapes, but that would have had a limited amount attached to it so what what better way to get a hold of the money than to give birth to a Cullen heir. The mistake I made in this was tossing the used condoms in the trash and making Tanya clean the playroom after a session.

I never wanted children, they didn't fit in with my lifestyle and I sure as hell didn't want any with Tanya, but there we were expecting our first child together. I couldn't kick Tanya out while she was pregnant and from the first time Lizzy was placed in my arms, I belonged to her and there was no way that I was allowing her to go and live with her incompetent mother.

So the playroom door was locked and the key all but thrown away, my life revolved around Lizzy and work and my nightly fantasies of Isabella Swan strapped to the whipping bench in my playroom. Yeah I never did get her out of my mind, no matter how many submissive I've been with I always wondered what it would have been like if I'd waited for Isabella. She left the day of graduation, no-body knows where she went, but Alice was devastated and to be honest so was I. I think I was always hoping that if Alice and Isabella formed a friendship, it would always keep her close to me. Looking back with thirteen years experience, I know that Jasper was right in his assumption of her – Isabella Swan was a natural submissive – I also know that what I once saw as dark and dirty about my lifestyle, I now see as freedom and trust and respect. So yeah I often wonder what could have happened had Isabella not left Forks. But to look on the bright side, I wouldn't have Lizzy or Masen and being without them these past three weeks have proven without a shadow of a doubt that they are my world.

Two years after Lizzy was born, I filed for custody of Lizzy and Jasper was positive I would get it. Tanya was a terrible mother, our nanny Angela had been monitoring Tanya's interactions with Lizzy before I even asked her to and suggested that I get Nanny-Cams installed – and this was coming _from_ the nanny! The Nanny-Cams turned out to be a God-send showing neglect and mistreatment of Lizzy when she was left in Tanya's care, the poor child wasn't even allowed to call her Mommy when they were alone, but had to when I or anyone else was there – this was something that had to been extremely confusing to a two year old Lizzy. The night I confronted Tanya and asked her to leave the house is a little sketchy, I remember the start of the conversation, but the part that came after I took the beer she offered me are non-existent, the only part of that 'conversation' that exists for me is Masen, the date rape drug that Tanya slipped into my drink is what resulted in me waking up naked next to Tanya the following morning with the mother of all hangovers.

Lizzy and I were settling nicely into a new routine with Tanya gone and Tanya was being charged with rape – would you believe – and was bailed awaiting trial when she knocked on my door four weeks later to tell me that she was pregnant. After an amniocentesis proved that the child was in fact mine, Tanya moved back in and charges were dropped. Angela was taken on full time as a live in Nanny so that Lizzy would never have to be left alone with Tanya even though she had started attending playgroup to improve her social skills. I think Tanya knew that she would be out on her ear as soon as Masen was in my care, so for some ungodly reason, she walked out of the hospital with a one day old baby, collected my three year old daughter from playgroup and disappeared – I'm still waiting for the random note.

"Hey, how you holding up," Alice asked as she walked into the Masen's Nursery where I sat aimlessly rocking in his ricking chair that stood below his windows looking out at the water that surrounded Bainbridge Island.

"Truthfully, I don't know, Ali, she's crazy, she always has been but no matter how much I hate her, I love Liz and Mas twice as much and not knowing what their crazy ass mother is doing to them is seriously fucking my head up," My head fell into my hands, and not for the first time in the last three weeks I cried.

"Hey, we'll find them, I promise we'll find them. We have so many people out there looking for them and the broadcasts are on every news channel, someone has to see something soon," Alice's tried to reassure me as she crouched down next to the rocking chair.

"I know, it's just. . .hang on" I pulled the phone that had started vibrating in the pocket of my jeans and looked at the number, it wasn't one I recognized. "Edward Cullen" I answered.

"Good evening, Mr Cullen. My name is Detective Crowley, I'm of the Jacksonville Police Department," the moment the word _detective _left the callers lips I was on my feet.

"How can I help you this evening, Detective." Alice's head shot up and she stared at me as I paced the length of the room.

"We have reason to believe that we may have located you son and daughter." My stomach shot up to my throat, my heart was racing a mile a minute and I froze on the spot staring at Alice.

"Where? How? Oh dear God are they okay?" Alice leapt to her feet pulling her phone out of her own pocket as she asked me where they are.

"Jacksonville," I mouthed to her.

"A witness, heard shouting and a baby crying on her way home from work this evening, she went to investigate and arrived in time to see a young girl that matches the description of your daughter being struck by a dark haired woman while a baby lay in his car seat off to the side of the scene. As the witness made herself known the woman escaped in a black SUV leaving the two children in the parking lot," I couldn't breath, part of me was buzzing with anticipation that this could be the call that we had been waiting for, and that Lizzy and Masen had been found, part of me was livid that Lizzy had been hit by who ever this person was that had them and part of me was dreading that this has all be some mistake and that this isn't Lizzy and Masen at all.

"Are the children, okay? You said the woman had dark hair, Tanya – their mother who took them – has fair hair are you sure it's Lizzy and Masen that you've found." I asked dreading the answer.

"The helicopter will be here in ten minutes to take us to the airport, Arthur is just fulling the jet and should be ready for when we get there" Alice spoke quickly as she raced out of the nursery.

"I can't give you any detailed information on the children's well-being, but I do know that they are both stable in the Paediatric Intensive Care Unit at Jacksonville Medical Centre. As for the second part of your question, the lady that found the children identified the woman as a Miss Tanya Denali," I was being dragged out of the nursery at this point and pushed down the stairs by my pixie sized sister. Jazz and my mom were waiting at the bottom of the stairs, their coats already on and I could hear the engines of Charlie Papa in the distance.

"Intensive Care, are they okay?" Oh God please let them be okay.

"Like I said Mr Cullen, I don't have that information to give you" The detective insisted.

"Can I ask how Tanya was identified by a stranger, at night from a distance when she is apparently trying to disguise her appearance?" To me, you have to know someone really well to be able to do something like that. My mom smiled and wrapped her arms around my waists and buried her head in my chest, her and my dad have been almost as lost as I have without Lizzy – they hadn't even had a chance to meet Masen.

"Apparently the witness went to high school with Miss Denali," what the fuck?

"High school? Can I ask the name of the witness?" If she's got fucking Jessica Stanley or Lauren Mallory sending me on a wild fucking goose chase I'm gonna rip her fucking head off.

"Yeah, it a Miss Isabella Swan."


	3. Chapter 3

**Welcome to chapter 3. This shows explains the injuries caused by child abuse. I have stared it but again you will miss the story line if you don't read.**

EPOV

Chapter 3

"I'm sorry, did you say Isabella Swan?" I asked, Alice and Jazz both stared at me wide eyed.

"Yes, sir, she says she grew up in Forks, Washington where yourself and Miss Denali attended high school," what are the fucking chances? Seriously out of the millions of people in the continental US that could have found my children, it happens to be the one woman who I can't get off my mind.

"Right, well we're on our way, is Miss Swan okay?" I had to ask, I have to see her.

"She's fine sir, maybe a little shook up from the experience, but from the sound of it you have that young lady to thank for the life of at lease one of your children,"

"Of course, is there anyway that I can contact her?" Please let there be away.

"Miss Swan is refusing to leave the hospital until she knows that both children are in the clear and are safely returned to you, so I'm sure that you will see her when you arrive." I could hear the awe in his voice, I smiled the first smile that I have in three weeks. Of course Isabella wouldn't leave my children alone, why would I have expected anything less of her.

"Well if you could let her know that we are on our way and will be there as soon as possible? Could you also pass this number on to her and to the hospital in case there is an emergency?" I asked as I climbed on to the helicopter for the short ride to the private airfield.

"Of course sir, I'll pass that along and see you when you get here." After a quick goodbye we hung up and Charlie Papa was ready for take off.

"What was all that about Isabella Swan?" Jasper asked once we all had our headsets in place.

"She's the one that found Lizzy and Masen, she's at the hospital refusing to leave until she knows that they're okay and that they are back with me. She identified Tanya but she got away." I didn't know whether to huff or jump for joy.

"You mean this is really them, they found your babies?" My Mom asked, tears filling her eyes.

"We'll have to wait until we get there for us to make a positive ID but by the sound of it, yeah, it's Lizzy and Masen,"

BPOV

I'd just finished being interview by Detective Crowley and he'd gone off to make a phone call when a doctor came running out of the room that Lizzy and Masen had been taken into and rushed over to the nurses station and hurriedly pulled up some information on the computer system. I walked closer pretending to be looking at the drinks machine.

"She's AB negative and we don't have enough in stock, I need you to call around and get some here as quickly as possible," the frantic doctor order the equally frantic nurse. If this was Lizzy – hell even if it wasn't – I needed to do something, I could help.

"Excuse me," I called as I approached the desk.

"Yes, can I help you?" the nurse asked looking rather put out by my interruption, not that I could blame her.

"I'm sorry but I over heard that you are in need of AB negative – I'm AB negative is there anything that I can do to help?" The doctor slammed the phone down and turned to me.

"Aren't you the young lady that came in with the Cullen children?" She asked.

"Yes" I answered simply.

"Perfect. Get her up to the lab for testing and someone get the father on the phone, we need positive identification and permission for a blood transfusion." Oh God, Lizzy, shit.

"Miss, if you would like to follow me?" The nurse asked coming around the counter.

"Yeah, sure" I confirmed as I scurried behind her.

"Talk about being in the right place at the right time, not only did you save both the kiddies lives from the crazy mother who took them, but now you just happen to have the same rare blood group as the little girl," The nurse shook her head and smiled at me as she led me down to the medical lab for blood tests. "There are not many people out there like you, Isabella Swan" I could feel my blush warming my cheeks. I didn't think that I what I had done tonight was anything that any other decent person wouldn't have, and truthfully I would have done it for any child, but I especially owed it to Edward, after all, I wouldn't be here myself if it wasn't for him.

"Their father saved my life when I was thirteen, it's the least I can do," I don't know why I felt the need to share that piece of information with the grandmother like nurse that was handing me paperwork to complete, maybe I had just taken in so much tonight that I needed an outlet, I needed to share something.

"Don't try to justify a good heart," she smiled and patted me on the shoulder. "If you fill in all of your details we can pull up your records, that should speed the process up.

I'd supplied a blood sample, Lizzy had been identified via videophone, medical and dental records, permission had been granted for her blood transfusion and I'd donated a pint and a half of blood to the little angel. It was a little more than what is normally taken, so here I lay in a hospital bed, wired up to an IV to replenish vital fluids at six forty-five AM. I was just dosing off for the first time in twenty three hours when the door to my room opened and the nurse that had taken me down to the lab walked in.

"How are you feeling, Isabella?" She asked as she checked my IV line.

"I'm fine, just tired," I yarned – just to prove a point, I don't think I have ever been so exhausted. "How are Lizzy and Masen?" I knew she couldn't tell me much, but I had to know if they were okay.

"Thanks to you, they are both doing well, if you would like some more information, I have a couple of people outside that would like to come in and say hello," Butterflies erupted in my stomach.

"Edward's here?" I whispered. I'm not sure if my face flooded red or drained of colour completely but I suddenly didn't feel well and I was finding it really hard to breath.

"Hey, you feeling okay, sweetheart?" The nurse asked worriedly

"I'm fine, can I just have a drink please?" _What the hell in wrong with me? _

_Oh yeah that's right my high school crush turned dream Dom is on the other side of the door wanting to come in and see you. _

"Of course, and Mr Cullen and his mother are actually in with Lizzy and Masen at the moment but I have a Mr and Mrs Whitlock that would like to come in and see you," _Of course he is, stupid girl why would he want to come and see you?_

"I'm sorry but I don't know a Mr and Mrs Whitlo. . .Mr Jasper Whitlock?" Shit what the hell is Jasper Whitlock doing here to see me?

"I believe so, and Mrs Whitlock is Mr Cullen's sister," she supplied as she handed me a water glass. Alice. . . I'd never met her, she went to school in Paris, but I'd seen pictures and Edward had told me stories about her during our summer together.

"Of course, please send them in," I was more then happy to speak to any of Edwards family. The nurse smiled and left the room in search of my visitors – well not my visitors they are Lizzy and Masen's visitors but you know what I mean! I dug my compact mirror out of my hand bag with the idea of making sure that my hair looked okay, it was fine, the scary thing was my face, I literally had no colour, I was practically translucent. _Why do I have to face Edward Cullen looking like shit?_

I shoved the mirror back in my bag and pushed them both back in the cupboard next to my bed just as the door to my room burst open and a whirlwind of black and white blew into the room.

"Oh, my goodness, Isabella thank you, thank you, thank you so much," she sobbed as she fell against me on the bed, wrapping her arms around my neck and almost pulling my IV out. This has to be Alice.

"It's nice to meet you, Alice," I laughed lightly.

"Oh, you know my name, Jazz she knows my name, we're gonna be such good friends," Alice spoke so quickly I could hardly keep up with her, but at least she had let go of me and given me room to breath. I was able to get a better look at her now, she had been beautiful on the pictures that Edward had shown me of when she was younger, and she even looked beautiful on the TV broadcasts with no make up and tear stained cheeks – but stood here now, in skinny black jeans and a white silk blouse, her hair perfectly spiked in every direction and her make up completely flawless, she was a stunning.

"Alice, sugar give the poor girl room to breath," Jasper insisted as he followed Alice into the room. "How are you Isabella?"

"Just Bella please and I'm okay, just a little tired. Aside from recent events how have you been, Jasper?" I asked, pulling myself up on the bed a little more.

"I've been good thank you, Darlin'. All things considered, you're looking really well and I can't thank you enough for what you did for Lizzy and Masen,"

"I'm sure anyone would have done the same," I replied with a blush – at least I had some colour coming back to my cheeks.

"That maybe so, Bella but it was you that did and we could never thank you enough" Alice insisted. I could see the tears welling in her eyes and with the emotional and physically exhaustion I was feeling today I couldn't stop myself from joining her.

"You're more than welcome, Alice, I would do it all again in a heartbeat" I promised on a quiet sob. Alice fell into my arms once again but I was expecting her this time and I wrapped my arms around her and held her close as we both cried.

EPOV

I'd had Masen and Lizzy moved into a joint room in the PICU with a private medical team assigned to them, there was no way that I could split my time between the two of them and this was the best way to ensure that they received the best care possible. Lizzy had woken briefly about half an hour after we arrived and I had to pinky swear that I wasn't going to leave her before she would agree to go back to sleep. I stood now looking over Masen who was wired up to a drip and a feeding tube and was yet to open his eyes.

**(starts here) **Both of the children had lost weight in the three weeks that they had been away, that fact was bad enough with Lizzy who was dehydrated, malnourished, dirty and covered in bruises up her arms where it looks like Tanya had been grabbing at her as well as the bruised cheek and fractured scull where Tanya had backhanded her in the parking lot of the local Thriftway. Masen who was now three weeks and two days old, had gone from a birth weight of 7lb 4oz down to an extremely dangerous 5lb 5oz, he was – as you can imagine – malnourished and dehydrated, he had infected blisters on his bottom from unchanged diapers and was suffering from hypothermia. Needless to say Isabella's actions last night had saved both of my children's lives, they wouldn't have made it until morning out in the elements – Lizzy would have bleed out from her head injury and Masen would have died from hypothermia. I wiped the tear that had fallen from my eye with the back of my hand, but more followed in its path and the lump in my throat was painful. I felt small arms come around my waist and I turned and buried my head in my Mom's hair, letting her comfort me in a way she hasn't since I was a small boy. **(ends here)**

"Your Dad is on his way," she whispered, my Dad had been a life saver, he had suffered as much as the rest of us over the the last three week, but he had stepped back up to cover my place as CEO of Cullen Pharmaceuticals while I searched for my children.

"I was hoping he would be," At almost thirty one I was as much as a daddies boy as I was a mummies boy. I could only hope that I could be half as successful at parenting as my Mom and Dad were.

"I brought you a coffee," she whispered stroking my hair. I kissed the top of her head and pulled up straight, wiping the remaining tears from my eyes.

"Thank you" I whispered, we had been talking in whispered since we arrived two hours ago, afraid to disturber the two precious babies that were in need of rest.

"Have you seen the doctors while I was gone?" Mom asked as she perched on the edge of a chair.

"Yeah, doctor Snow came by, she said that Lizzy seems to be responding well to the transfusion and the fact that she knew who I was and who she was when she woke, is a good sign that she won't suffer any permanent damage. The only slight worry was that her speech was a little slurred but that could just be the pain medication that they have her on. Mas is still. . ." I cleared my throat, trying to erase the lump that was forming again. "Mas is still not out of the woods, he's on fifty percent oxygen and the infection from the blisters has entered his bloodstream, they will be back any minuet with intravenous antibiotics"

"Oh, baby," my Mom sniffed and buried her head in the hand that wasn't gripping on to her coffee for dear life. She has been trying to be strong for me throughout this whole ordeal and if she didn't let it out soon, she was going to have a breakdown. I rose from my perch at the bottom of Lizzy's bed and crouched on the floor by my Mom.

"It's okay to let it out, you don't have to be the strong one all the time" I whispered as I pulled her into my arms. Doctor Snow came in as I was holding my Mom and proceeded to insert yet another drip into the veins of my three week old son – curtsey of his mother.

The police have an AP out on Tanya, updated by Isabella's description of her new hair colour, location and the car that she is driving. The police are hoping that she is starting to panic and If she panics she will make mistakes, I'd kill her my fucking self if I ever laid eyes on her. I took a deep breath, getting myself worked up over Tanya isn't gonna help anyone right now, but it took every ounce of self-control I have ever learned to calm my breathing and slow my heart rate back down to a normal level.

Noticing doctor Snow is in the room, my Mom calmed herself again and wandered over to the incubator to get another look at her grandson.

"He's so beautiful, Edward, he is the image of you when you were born" she sobbed quietly.

"Yeah, I guess we are really lucky that the Cullen genes are so strong, I could never see anything of Tanya in Lizzy either, she just a miniature version of you." No truer words have ever been spoken, if you looked at pictures of my mom when she was little and compared them to Lizzy you would say they were twins and Mom is right, Mas is the image of me.

"He'll be okay, right doctor" my Mom was pleading for reassurance that we weren't going to loose Masen before we ever really had him.

"I'm sorry, Mrs Cullen but it really is two early to tell just yet. The next twenty four hours will be critical for him, but he is getting the best possible care," I knew all this, I'd had a very similar conversation with her while my Mom was getting coffee but it didn't make it any less difficult to hear.

"I'm sorry it took me so long to get here" relief flooded through me as my Dad strolled into the room. He bypassed my Mom and I and made his way straight over to Lizzy, kissing her head and whispering in her ear. My Mom fell in to my arms and doctor Snow quietly excused herself.

"So this is my handsome grandson," My Dad announced quietly as he made his way over to where we were standing by Masen's incubator. I gave him a brief nod, not able to find my voice as he peered through the box that housed my tiny son. "You did well, son," he whispered as he righted himself and wrapped my Mom and me, in his arms, but not before swiping away a tear of his own.

I sat for another hour with my Mom and Dad, going through everything that the doctors had told us and spending time holding hands with both Lizzy and Masen. Jazz came wandering in at eight o'clock, looking as exhausted as I felt, kissed Lizzy on the head and sank down in a chair next to mine.

"Where's Alice?" I hadn't seen her since she ran out of here crying two hours ago.

"Would you believe me if I told you that she is curled up in bed with Bella, where they have both cried themselves to sleep?" He asked, obviously I should believe him or else he wouldn't have said it.

"Well yeah if you're telling me, but who the hell is Bella?" He offered a half laugh, to tired and emotionally drained to offer more.

"Isa_bella_ dim-whit" he said with an eye roll.

"What is she doing in bed with Isabella? And how is she, I really need to go and see her," I felt extremely rude that I hadn't been to see her yet but I had been unable to pull myself away from Lizzy and Masen.

"She's perfectly fine, a little drained from giving so much blood and emotionally and physically tired from last nights events but other wise she's fine. She completely understands that you haven't been to see her, and said to tell you that she will kick you ass, if you even consider leaving their sides to go and see her. I hope you don't mind but we told her the problems that Liz and Mas are facing she was heartbroken and told me to tell you that if there is anything that she can do to just let her know," Jazz sat back after his speech shacking his head "You really missed out on a good one there," didn't I know it.

"Is this the young lady that found Lizzy and Masen?" My Dad asked.

"Yeah," I sighed, I didn't know what else to say.

"You already know her?" he pushed when he didn't get all of the information.

"Yeah, she's Chief Swans daughter Isabella, she was in Forks High for a couple of years while Jazz and I were there, I met her the summer we moved in, she is the same age as Ali but she left the day I graduated, I guess she moved here, I'm sure her mom was from Florida." I told him, hoping that he would drop the topic.

"You liked this girl?" I rolled my eyes refusing to answer but Jazz jumped in anyway.

"Oh yeah he definitely had a thing for Isabella Swan, she didn't really fit in at school, she carried a few extra pounds and couldn't walk across a flat surface without tripping over thin air. Anyway, Eddie here was always her knight in shining armour ready to sweep in and place her back on her feet. No one dare utter a negative word about her unless they wanted in _ass_ kicking from Edward, but alas she was fifteen he was eighteen and by the time she was old enough for him to pursue her he was in Dartmouth and she was obviously in Jacksonville."

"You forgot the part where the smooth bastard saved her from drowning," I smiled and turned to face the door.

"Took you long enough to get your lazy good for nothing asses here and you call yourself Godparents?" I laughed lightly as I stood to greet the two people that have been missing from this picture.

"Don't Edward, how are they?" Rose asked as she pushed herself away from her bear of a husband. By the time I'd finished explaining what the doctors had said, Rose was inconsolable and even Emmett had shed a tear. I think Rose found it so hard as she had been the one to deliver both Lizzy and Masen, she had been on duty the day that Tanya took them, and somehow blamed herself for not noticing that they were missing sooner. Rose – like the rest of us – had never liked Tanya so only ventured into her room when it was time to check on Masen and by that point Tanya had been long gone.

"D-daddy?" it was barely a whisper, but in the silence that had envelope the room and with the significance of the sound, it may as well have been yelled through a megaphone every eye in the room turned towards Lizzy who was watching us through rapidly blinking eyes.

"Hey, Baby" I cooed pushing her hair out of her face "Would you like a little drink of water?" I offered trying not to make too much of a big deal out of her being awake, when inside I was turning cartwheels.

"Yes please" she whispered, I stood and placed a gentle kiss on the top of her forehead and pulled a sippy cup and a bottle of water out of the bag that Alice had put together for Lizzy before we left Seattle. "Why is everyone here?" she asked, I imagine that it can be quite confusing to see so many people surrounding you when you just wake up and probably the reason why only two people are usually allowed into a room at a time.

"We just came to see how you and Masen are sweetie, Uncle Jazz, Uncle Em and I are just nipping out, we'll come back and see you in a little while okay?" I mouthed a quiet thank you to Rose as she dragged Em and Jazz out of the room, leaving just Mom, Dad and I.

"Hey, sugarplum how are you feeling," Dad asked as he lent over to offer her a kiss of his own. I noticed that my Mom had pressed the call button so knew that the doctor would be in any minute.

"I have a headache, grandpa," Lizzy whispered and it almost tore my heart out. I gave her the sippy cup and raised the bed slightly so she could drink.

"I know, baby, the doctor will be come and see you in just a minute and then she will be able to give you something to make the pain go away," I promised.

"Where's Masen?" she was still whispering but her words didn't seem as slurred as they did earlier.

"He's right over there sleeping sweetheart," My Mom told her. I'm glad she did as I wouldn't be able to find my voice.

"Where's. . .T-t-t-tanya?" My Mom looked away clutching at her chest and I had to close my eyes for a second to compose myself. The fear in Lizzy's voice when she stuttered _that_ name will haunt me forever. I pulled myself from the chair and sat on the edge of Lizzy's bed – it didn't escape my notice that she didn't say Mommy.

"She's gone, baby I promise you won't ever have to see her again if you don't want to," I told her as I wrapped her in my arms, being careful of the bandage around her head that was protecting the stitches.

"I don't" she whispered on a sob "I. . .m-m-missed . . you. . .d-d-daddy. . .s-she wouldn't. . .let. . .m-me. . .s-s-see you" I swallowed thickly and cleared my throat trying to get rid of the huge lump that had formed from my daughters words.

"I know, baby but I'm here now and I promise I'm not going anywhere and you don't have to see her again," My Mom and Dad had left the room, I don't think either one of them wanted to let Lizzy see them cry. The doctor came by to check her vitals and to add some more pain relief to her IV. Alice even made it back in time to spend two minutes laughing with a very drunk sounding Lizzy before she fell back asleep.

"Bella is being discharged in the next couple of hours, I left her asleep, but if you want to go and see her, now would be a good time," Alice was right, but pulling myself away form Lizzy and Masen was the hardest thing I've ever had to do.

"Keep your phone on and we'll call you if you're needed," My mom promised.

"Don't leave them for a second, promise me you wont." I begged, the fear that Tanya could walk in her and take them again was freezing me to the spot.

"She can't get in here Edward, the police are in the hall way monitoring the door, Em and Jazz will be back in a minute and neither Mom, Dad, Rose or I will leave this room until _you_ get back." I nodded my head, placed a quick kiss on Lizzy's and rann a finger softly down Masen's cheek praying that he would still be holding on when I got back from Isabella's room.

**Please leave a review - Edward and Bella meet in the next chapter with I will try and post tomorrow. x**


	4. Chapter 4

**Sorry this isn't another update as such. I was in such a rush yesterday to get chapter 4 out to you and when I went back and read it last night I was like – WTF? I was really disappointed in what I had written and knew that I could do better. So here is an updated version of chapter 4. I've not really added anything new as I didn't want you to **_**have**_** to re-read it (even though I really wanted to continue Bella's part of the chapter) so if you skip this update, you wont really miss anything other then Edwards internal rambling.**

**Vik**

EPOV

Chapter 4

Walking out of that hospital room leaving my injured daughter and gravely ill son has to be one of the hardest things I have ever had to do, trying to convince myself with each step that they were in safe hands with the rest of my family. The further away from Lizzy and Masen I walked, the tighter my chest became, I could feel the panic rising, my breathing was becoming shallow and I knew if I didn't calm down I was going to hyperventilate. Spying a bathroom on my left, I pushed my way in and slammed the door behind me before sliding to the ground clutching at my hair and chest willing the tightness to ease. All of the emotions from the past three weeks suddenly came crashing down on me and my whole body shook with the sobs that I have been trying to hold in. I knew that Lizzy would be okay, but I cried for what she had been through at the hands of her mother and I cried for the emotional turmoil that she will continue to go through for God knows how long, images of her tiny fragile body, curled up in the the large hospitallast bed flashed behind my tightly closed eyelids and unstoppable tears poured down my cheeks. I cried for Masen and all that his tiny body had to endure during his short life, a life that could come to an end at any time. Was he strong enough to fight all that Tanya had done to him? Was I strong enough to withstand loosing him? As much as you hold on to hope, the plain truth is that we could still loose him and that thought was ripping my heart out. How could anyone – even Tanya – treat children so poorly, so neglectfully? Was there anything that I could have done differently to avoid this happening, could I have cared for her the way she wanted me to? Should we have married so that she had unlimited access the my accounts? Would that have stopped her? Having Lizzy had made me soft, maybe I should have been the heartless bastard that I always was and had her charged once again with the rape as soon as Masen was born, that way she would have been watched and not had the opportunity to walk out of that hospital and into the unknown with my children. Hundreds of _what if's_ and _maybe's_ raced through my mind and self-loathing seeped through my pours – how would I ever forgive _myself _for what had happened? I knew that I had to compose myself, I had to visit with Isabella and I had to get back to Lizzy and Masen as soon as possible. I swiped at the tears that were still running in torrents, pressing the heal of my hands into my eyes to try and stop the flow. My breathing that was still shallow was now interrupted with hiccuping sobs and I sat, elbows resting on my knees, fingers clutching at my hair and the heals of my hands still pushed into my eyes while my breathing evened out and my tears ran dry.

Pulling myself off the ground I walked over to the sink to splash some cold water on my face, I was only on the floor for a matter of minutes but by the state of my reflection in the mirror, you would think that I had been there for days. I think that the purple shadows under my eyes are now a permanent feature, I looked gaunt and sallow, pail and lifeless. Sighing I did what I came over here intending to do and washed my face with cold water, patted it dry on a hand full of paper towels and made my way out of the room.

I hadn't asked Alice which room Isabella was in, although I knew that she was on the fourth floor so I made my way over to the nurses station where two nurses stood, one shifting through files the other rapidly typing on the computer.

"Hello, I was wondering if you could tell me what room Isabella Swan is in?" I asked a flustered looking nurse, she stopped short when she saw me standing there and composed herself quickly.

"Certainly, Mr Cullen, Miss Swan is in room 412, if you go to the end of the hall and turn left, it's the second door on your right," she replied, I guess that news travels fast in this place if she knew who I was, thanking her and made my way down the hall.

I paused outside room 412 preparing myself to see Isabella for the first time in over twelve years. Taking a deep breath I knocked lightly on the door, quietly enough to avoid waking her if she was sleeping, but loud enough to announce my arrival if she was changing, after receiving no response I decided to enter. I pushed the door open slowly and my eyes instantly fell on the figure curled up under the covers with her back to me. She looked so tiny wrapped up in blankets on the hospital bed – which surprised me – her hair was sprawled out behind her, the thick locks lit with the red highlights that I remembered from our days on the beach, that first summer in Forks. I made my way around to the other side of the bed wanting to take the opportunity to study her face while she slept, I didn't know if I would get another chance.

My eyes rested on her face and my breath left my lungs in a rush, if Isabella was beautiful at fifteen, there were no words for her now. For a split second I considered the fact that I may have walked into the wrong room but I quickly pushed that thought aside, she may _look_ _different _but there was no mistaking her heart shaped – all-be-it thinner – face, her pouty rose coloured lips, her pale skin and her thick dark eyelashes that rested on her high cheekbones as she slept soundlessly. I was utterly speechless as I sank down into the chair by her bed and extremely thankful that she was in fact sleeping, It gave me more time to pull myself together and there was no doubt in my mind, that had she been awake when I first laid eyes on her, I would have made a complete fool of myself. Gone was the composed thirty year old CEO who can make multi-million dollar deals without breaking a sweat and in his place was a sixteen year old geek trying to get a date with the head cheerleader – and I had _never _been that boy! I sat watching her, silently wondering what could have been had she not left Forks all those years ago, if Lizzy and Masen had been hers instead of Tanya's and what would happen now? Was she single? Would I like the person that she had become? Would she like me? There was no doubt that I found her attractive – but then again I always had. Could I bring her into my lifestyle – one thing I could never do was enter into a vanilla relationship. The biggest question though was why the hell I was even thinking about all of this, she lived in Florida and I in Seattle and all of my time and attention now would be centred around Lizzy and Masen.

Her eyelids fluttered and my heartbeat skyrocketed, I wiped my now sweaty palms on my jeans and tried to concentrate on my breathing, I still had no idea what I was going to say to her. Blinking the sleep out of her eye's she pried them open and I was met with the beautiful brown orbs that had haunted my dreams for years and a small hesitant smile.

"Edward," she whispered, her voice husky from sleep as she attempted to right herself on the bed. I jumped up to help her, bust soon realised that I had no idea where to place my hands and if she wanted help at all, her smiled warmed as she pulled herself upright and I sat back down, perched on the edge of my seat.

"How are you feeling?" I asked after clearing my throat, it was drier than the sahara desert at noon, I'm sure all of the moisture in my body was in the palm of my hands.

"I'm good, thanks, how are you holding up? How are the children?" she asked quickly, I was surprised that she was alert enough to ask and touched that the well being of my children and I was at the forefront of her mind upon waking.

"I'm okay, Lizzy is doing well she's asleep again at the moment she was awake for about an hour earlier but the pain medication makes her groggy. Masen is. . .he's um," I cleared my throat and closed my eyes, refusing to cry in front of her. I suddenly felt a warm hand wrap around mine and I looked up to see tears streaming down Isabella's face, causing me to have to wipe one of my own away. I squeezed the hand that she had offered me in comfort and forced out a small smile. "Masen, well we're not sure yet," I shrugged "He's stable but his vitals are yet to improve."

"I'm so sorry, if there is anything I can do, just let me know," she offered quietly. I don't know what else she could offer, she had gone above and beyond what anyone would have ever asked her for.

"I can't thank you enough for what you have already done, if you hadn't have stepped in last night I would have lost both of my children and as for what you did for Lizzy well, there are no words," I told her honestly "Thank you doesn't come close to what I feel I should say, but thank you, so very much and know that if you ever need anything, anything at all I would go to the end of the earth to give it to you." I looked into her eyes as I spoke, she had to know how sincere I was. How do you even come close to being able to thank the person that saved the life of your children and then offer her blood like water to save one of those children yet again?

"You don't have to thank me, but you're welcome, I would have drowned fourteen years ago if it wasn't for you, so let's say we're even," she laughed lightly, a pink blush was colouring her cheeks, I knew that she didn't take what she had done for me lightly, she was just struggling accepting my thanks. She always was selfless.

"You look really well, Isabella, how have you been?" I need to get off the topic of Lizzy and Masen for just five minutes before I broke down again and I wanted to know this person again.

"I've been good, Jacksonville is a lot different to Forks – bigger, you know. I think I managed to find a niche here, part of me will be sad to leave," she shrugged.

"You're leaving? Where are you moving too?" I was suddenly panicked I had only just found her, I couldn't loose her again. She giggled softly and blushed, I wondered what she could be embarrassed about.

"Yeah, um would you believe that I'm moving back to Seattle, I've just been offered a placement at Pitter Patter, in your building in fact," her blush grew as she told me this and butterflies took flight in the pit of my stomach and I wanted nothing more than jump up and replicate Chandler Bing's happy dance.

"Wow, that's great, so you're what, a teacher?" I asked calmly, trying to pull more information out of her. I was still processing the fact that she would be working in my building at the daycare centre that Lizzy attends.

"Yeah, I was teaching Pre-K, but was made redundant a few months ago in a round of cut backs and it's tough to find anything down here at the moment so I thought I'd move back to Seattle, closer to my Dad. How have you been, I heard you'd taken over from your Dad?" she quickly diverted the topic of conversation away from herself, she may have changed in appearance but inside she was still them same Isabella Swan and I had never been so grateful for the economic downturn.

"Yeah, almost five years ago now, it's going well I think but between work and Lizzy life has been kind of hectic, add Masen into the mix now and I'm sure to be kept on my toes." I refused to think that he wasn't going to be coming home with us. I was about to ask when she was moving but was interrupted as the door opened and a middle-aged nurse walked in.

"How are you feeling, Bella," she asked sweetly as she walked over to check her IV. It took me by surprise every time I heard her being called that, but it suited her.

"I feel fine," she smiled.

"Well, I've got your discharge papers here, I just need to unhook you and get a signature from you, then you are free to go," The nurse looked at me pointedly and I knew that this was my que to leave, I had been away from Lizzy and Masen long enough anyway, between sitting on the bathroom floor and watching Isabella sleeping I must have been an hour. I stood and turned to Isabella.

"I'll leave you to get sorted, but if you have time before you leave I'm sure my mom and dad would love to see you," I was begging silently for her to take me up on my offer, I needed to see her again and I knew that my mom and dad would love nothing more than to thank her for what she had done.

"I have time, are you sure that I won't be in the way if I nip down, I would love to see the children if that's okay," she asked shyly

"It's more than okay," I told her honestly, "I'll leave your name at the desk to let them know that it's okay for you to come straight in," I couldn't stop myself from leaning down and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead, she blushed again and looked down at her hands, "We're on the second floor in the Paediatric ICU."

"Okay, I'll see you in a while," she said as she looked up and smiled at me. I nodded and offered her a small smile in return as I made my way out of the room and back down to Lizzy and Masen.

BPOV

My heart was hammering in my chest, it hadn't stopped since I opened my eyes to see Edward Cullen sat beside my bed. My God he had aged well, aside from the dark circles under his eyes, no doubt from exhaustion he was gorgeous, so, so gorgeous, every part of my body was tingling. I needed to compose myself before I made my way down to the PICU what kind of person was I, lusting after a man who was suffering so? And he was suffering, understandably and I couldn't stop the tears that had fallen when he more or less told me that Masen might not make it. I could see that he was trying his hardest to hold back his own tears and I didn't help him one bit with my overactive tear-ducts.

Tess – the nurse that had been attending to me since last nigh cleared her throat, snapping me out of my daydream.

"He seems to have that effect on all of the women here, some of the men too I believe," she laughed lightly. I of course blushed, erasing any chance I had of denying that I was effecting by him and a bout of jealousy hit the pit of my stomach, I didn't like the thought of other people lusting after him.

"He's had that effect on me since I was thirteen," I laughed quietly.

"That's understandable, if I was twenty years younger," she sighed causing me to laugh again. "So are you ready to get out of here?" she asked as she started to pull the IV out of my hand. I cringed and looked away. I have always had an aversion to blood, it was a miracle that I hadn't passed out last night, but it's amazing what an adrenaline rush can do.

"I am, but I've got a week off work so you'll probably see me camped out in the hallways until I know for sure that Masen and Lizzy are okay." I told her honesty. I didn't have much packing left to do, I had already shipped the big stuff to my new apartment in Seattle so it was just the few clothes I had kept here, my toiletries and a couple of pots and pans.

"It sound like you have an invitation to visit in the children's room with the Cullen's, I doubt we will be seeing much of you in the hallways," she chuckled, I know that Edward had said that I could go and see them before I left, but I don't think that it was a open invitation and I wouldn't want to get in their way, especially at a time like this.

"Maybe," I shrugged.

"Okay, well you're all set, I just need you to sign your name here for release," I quickly signed the release forms but noticed that my insurance was missing.

"I still haven't signed the forms for my insurance," I told Tess, she smiled and shook her head.

"The cost of your stay with us is being covered by Mr Cullen," My heart warmed, and tears sprang up in my eyes, trust Edward to do something like that, I would definitely have to thank him when I went down. "Mrs Whitlock left you a change of clothes, they are in your bathroom, she placed them there while you were sleeping," Tess told me, I shook my head, how could they be thinking of my needs at a time like this? I suddenly felt guilty that they felt that they had to think about me, they didn't, I was just here to help. I smiled at Tess and thanked her for all her help and made my way into the bathroom to try and make myself presentable to go and meet the rest of the Cullen's.


	5. Chapter 5

**Welcome to chapter 5 - WELL AHEAD OF SCHEDULE YAY! It is longer than the others also. I will give the criers among you that you may need to bring the tissues with you when you read this. **

**Another BIG thanks to all of you have have reviewed it is really great to know that you are enjoying this story, keep them coming and I will keep the chapters coming. Chapter 6 is now the one that you should expect on tueday but if you're lucky i will get it posted before then, Karma is still writing itself and I am sure that you will be desperate for the next chapter once you get to the end of this so if I get LOTS and LOTS of reviews I will have it to you before tuesday!**

**Love ya all**

**Vik**

BPOV

Chapter 5

I made my way into the bathroom slightly apprehensive of what I would find. I didn't know Alice very well at all, I'd spent all of a hour talking to her and Jasper earlier this morning before we cried ourselves to sleep after her telling me all of the problems that Lizzy and Masen had to overcome before they could go home – that's if Masen made it home at all. The only thing that I would have changed from last night is catching up to Tanya before she had a chance to run, she would honestly be in the hospital herself right now if I had gotten my hands on her. I wasn't a violent person, but I had changed a lot since high school and children always brought out the protective mama bear in me.

I closed the bathroom door and turned to see a black sports bag on the counter by the sink, I caught my reflection in the mirror as I approached the bag and cringed. What a great impression I must have made on Edward. My hair was like a haystack, I was still translucently pale and I looked exhausted from only having a few hours sleep. Sighing I unzipped the bag to see what Alice had so kindly brought me. The first thing that caught my eye was a pink toiletry bag so I pulled it out and opened it, Alice had gone above and beyond with this. Inside was a toothbrush, toothpaste, face-wash, body-wash, shampoo and conditioner all from _Molton Brown_ the body wash and hair products were strawberry scented and I wondered how she knew that it was my favourite. I smiled and placed the bag on the counter and reached in to the bigger bag to see what else she had left. I quickly pulled out a pair of black legging – _who knew Christian Dior made leggings! –_ a long grey jersey top with a v-neck and three quarter length sleeves – also Christian Dior, plain black cotton panties and bra from La Pearla – of all places, a pair of black socks and grey cardigan Ugg boots. Other things in the bag consisted of a hair brush, hair ties, a couple of towels, a body scrunchy and a few cosmetics. I was completely speechless and just stood there looking over all of the things that now littered the counter, I couldn't accept all of this – she was out of her mind if she though I could.

I quickly made my way out of the bathroom to collect the things that I had worn the day before and almost leapt out of my skin when I saw Alice perched on the end of my bed.

"You scared the life out of me, Alice," I chastised lightly.

"Sorry, Edward told me that you were getting ready and I thought I would come and see if everything was okay," she shrugged, not really looking sorry at all.

"Everything is really great, Alice, honestly, but I can't accept all of that, there is no way I could pay you back." I told her truthfully. She scowled at me, and I actually took a step back – she was a scary little thing.

"Pay me back?" she asked incredulously "Bella, do you have any idea of what you have done for my family? You saved the lives of my niece and nephew and most likely my brother when you stopped that crazy bitch from harming them further, then you jumped in and offered Lizzy your blood like you were handing out popcorn at the theatre, once again saving her life, who knows how long it would have taken for them to get blood here for her, and you stand there telling me that you can't _pay me back _for a few scraps of material?" Alice ranted causing me to hang my head in shame. I had always had a problem with taking gifts from others but even I could see her point.

"I'm sorry, Alice, I didn't mean to upset you, I'm just not very good at accepting things from others." I admitted.

"Well get used to it, you're family now and as a family we like to spoil each other. Now get your tush in the shower and get dressed so that I can take you down to the PICU." I felt tears well in my eyes partly in guilt and partly in gratitude, nodded my head and turned to go back into the bathroom.

After brushing my teeth I jumped in the shower, it felt great, I hated being in the hospital, the bedding makes you sweat and your skin starts to smell like the chemicals they use to clean the place. I squirted some of the strawberry body-wash onto the scrunchy and proceeded to scrub my body until my skin tuned pink. I quickly washed my hair before jumping out and drying myself off with the large fluffy towel wrapping a smaller one around my dripping wet hair. I was trying to be a quick as possible so as not to keep Alice away from Lizzy and Masen too long, but me and rushing never mix well and I soon found myself in a heap on the floor after slipping on a puddle of water that had formed around my feet.

"Ow, shit" I cursed rubbing the side of my face where I had hit it on the toilet. _Great, just fucking great!_

"Bella, are you okay?" Alice called banging on the door, I'd locked it, so she couldn't get in.

"I'm fine, Alice. I'll be out in a minute," I called back, pulling my now aching body off the floor and rubbing my sore backside.

"You sure?" she asked again.

"Positive," I replied as I took the towel off my head to stand on. I really needed to be more careful. I towelled myself off, following the age old advice – more hurry less speed – and pulled on the outrageously comfortable clothes that Alice had brought, they fit like they had been made for me and I wondered how she new my size. Now I don't normally wear make-up but I looked so deathly pale that I decided to put on a little powder and blush. I groaned and internally rolled my eyes when I caught my reflection once again. On the side of my face, from cheek to temple, was the beginning of a nice purple bruise – _just wonderful! _I told myself sarcasticly. Only I could injure myself in the hospital. I didn't have any concealer to cover it up with, so just opted to wear my wet hair down in hope that it would hide the worst of it.

Taking a calming breath I re-packed the sports bag, slipped on the Ugg boots – another great purchase by Alice – and made my way out of the bathroom.

"What the _hell _did you do to yourself, Bella?" Alice shouted, rushing across the room to me and lifting my hair away from my face – best laid plans and all that!

"Nothing, don't worry about it, I just slipped getting out of the shower," I shrugged.

"Maybe we should get someone to come and look at it," she said, worrying her bottom lip between her teeth.

"Honestly, Alice, it looks worse than it is, and I'm really ready to get out of here," I gave her my best puppy dog eyes and she sighed reluctantly agreeing to leave me be.

"Come on, Bambi let's get you out of here then," she chuckled, I rolled my eyes at her nickname for me and followed her out of the door. She already had my other clothes packed in a smaller bag then the one I was carrying – she would make a great personal assistant!

I stopped at the nurses desk on my way out just to say a quick thank you to Tess for watching out for me, she scoffed and pulled me into a tight hug, completely taking me by surprise.

"Don't be ridiculous, Bella! It was my pleasure, it's not often I get to treat someone like you. You take care of yourself okay?" she told me with a warm smile. I blushed and smiled back.

"I will, you too, Tess," she was an amazing nurse, one of the few who truly loved their job.

My heart was beating erratically as we walked towards the elevator, I was terrified of seeing Lizzy and Masen again, I wasn't an emotionally strong person and I knew the heartache that would hit me seeing them in a hospital room, I hadn't laid eyes on them since I handed Masen over to the doctors when we arrived here last night. I was also nervous about seeing Edward again and about meeting the rest of his family, the only person I knew other then Edward and Alice, was Jasper and we weren't what I would call friends. The elevator arrived, Alice and I had been as silent as each other since leaving the nurses station, it wasn't an uncomfortable silence, but it was a little heavy with tension, or maybe that was just me! I climbed in and crossed my arms around my waist, tapping my fingers on the opposite elbow of each arm.

"Are you okay?" Alice asked quietly.

"Yeah, sorry, just a little nervous," I admitted hesitantly, she eyed me carefully smiling slightly to herself. She was like a little ray of sunshine on a cloudy day. "What?" I asked her when she continued to stare at me.

"Oh nothing, don't worry, Bella I know that _everyone _will be thrilled to see you," she smiled, I didn't miss her exaggeration of the word _everyone _but chose to ignore it for the time being, the butterflies in my stomach where threatening to fly out of my mouth at any given moment so I couldn't find it in me to question her.

The doors to the elevator opened on the ICU floor and we stepped out. I had never been in a ICU before so I didn't know what to expect but the ward really took me by surprise. All of the walls to the private rooms were made completely of glass, even the doors were glass, nurse stations were spaced periodically along the hall way, it looked like there was one to every two rooms. There were optional blinds at all of the glass walls but most of them were open and I avoided looking in the rooms that were occupied.

"Why are all of the walls glass?" I asked Alice as we made our way down the corridor.

"It's so that the nursing staff and doctors can keep a watch out for any problems that the machine might not pick up, apparently. I actually asked Doctor Snow the same question earlier, she's Lizzy and Masen's doctor by the way," she supplied. I suppose it made sense but there was no privacy for the worried loved ones that surrounded each of the beds. "This is us," Alice announced as we stopped outside the last room in the hall.

The blinds were closed, blocking out the majority of the room but through the door I could see six people scattered around the large room, Alice pushed the door open and walked in ahead of me. I hesitated, Edwards eyes found mine and he smiled slightly as he stood from his perch at the end of the bed that stood to one side of the room, I broke away from his eyes and quickly scanned the rest of the room. At the opposite side of the room from the bed, where two of the people stood – a tall blond woman and a small slightly older woman with caramel hair – was a complicated looking incubator with all manor of wires and tubes sticking out of it. My stomach clenched and I quickly looked away, I didn't know if I was ready to see such a tiny baby fighting for his life. Edward approached me, every eye in the room – aside from Alice's – followed his movements.

"What on earth did you do to your face?" he asked, I shrugged and Alice rolled her eyes.

"She's a regular Bambi apparently," she laughed lightly.

"Some things never change, ay, Bella," Jasper said smiling at me.

"Not in this lifetime," I offered with another light shrug.

"Well, I'm glad you could make it down, in one piece or not," Edward joked lightly, "Come on in, here let me take that," He reached over and pulled the heavy bag from my shoulder, pushing in under a table by the glass wall and grabbed my hand in his as he pulled me gently into the room. "Everyone, this is Isa. . .sorry, this is Bella. Bella you already know Jasper and Alice, but the big guy by the window is my best friend and Lizzy's godfather, Emmett McCarty, over here is my Dad, Carlisle and by the incubator is my Mom, Esme and Emmett's wife and Lizzy's godmother Rosalie," Edward announced. Before I could make any formal greeting I suddenly found myself wrapped up in a tight embrace.

"Oh, Bella it's so wonderful to finally meet you," Esme gushed into my hair, I automatically wrapped my arms around her in response, apparently needing the contact as much as she did. "I'm sure that Edward and Alice have already said this, but thank you so much for everything that you have done, you've given me back my family," She told me, holding me at arms length and looking me straight in the eye. I wiped a stray tear off my cheek and nodded my head at her, I couldn't speak through the lump in my throat. She smiled in understanding and gently stroked her finger down my bruised cheek, "Let me get you some ice for that," she squeezed my shoulder and hurried out of the room before I could protest. Next to join the party was Carlisle, I don't know what I was expecting of Edward Cullen's farther but it wasn't this. I think I always pictured him as being poised and stiff, he'd build Cullen Pharmaceuticals up from the ground, he was a self made _Billionaire _for Christ sake, and to me that meant professional, cold, domineering – just how I knew Edward could be at times. . .or used to be – but Carlisle Cullen with his blond hair greying at the temples, piecing blue eyes and Edwards lick-able jaw line, oozed warmth and approachability as he took both of my hands in his and leaned in to place a tender kiss on my forehead – I almost swooned and I definitely blushed, he was Edward in twenty years time – minus the bronze sex hair.

"I don't know what to say that hasn't already been said, Bella, but I have heard so many wonderful things about you in the last few hours and I know that if I was your father, I would be immensely proud of you. Welcome to the family, sweetheart." The tears were streaming down my face now but I managed to stutter out a quiet thank you. He squeezed my hand reassuringly before making his way over to grab a tissue from a box situated in the middle of the table that Edward had pushed my bag under and handed one to me, I wiped my eyes quickly, thanking him.

Edward gripped my hand again and tugged me lightly in the direction of the hospital bed that held a tiny figure curled up in the middle of it. Before I could reach it I once again found myself wrapped up in a tight embrace, only this time my feet were off the floor and I could hardly breath, Emmett – a huge bear of a man, with muscles that put Arny to shame, big brown eyes and curly dark hair – didn't say anything, he just held on to me tightly for a minute before setting me on my feet and quickly walking out of the room. I stared after him for a second before a tiny voice broke me out of my stunned state.

"Daddy, I want Barnacle," Lizzy whispered, Edward walked quickly over to her and sat on the bed.

"I know you do, sweetheart, Aunt Alice promised to go get you a new one as soon as we leave here okay, princess." Edward told her, running a hand gently through the bronze curls that were peaking out of the bandage that was wrapped around her head. Lizzy started crying quietly and my heart almost broke for her. I was guessing that Barnacle was her comforter of some sort, I had one myself when I was little – a brown bear call Snuggles – and I refused to go anywhere without him.

_"__P-please, M-momma I left B-barnacle inside" _I gasped as I heard the small pleading voice, it hadn't come from the bed though.

"I think it maybe at the Thriftway on the corner of Thirty second and Main" I said quietly, every eye turned to me. "I heard Lizzy tell Ta. . ._her _last night just before I saw them, I'm not positive but it's worth a try," Alice quickly jumped up and raced out of the room with her phone in hand. Carlisle smiled at me and Edward mouth a quiet 'thank you'. I nodded and slowly walked over to the bed.

Edward scooted over and Lizzy looked up at me with her big green watery eyes, I hadn't seen the colour of them last night as she was unconscious when I reached her, but they were Edwards eyes. She really was a tiny little thing, almost too small to be three years old, _she_ may have been tall but the two Cullen woman were tiny and as this little angel was the image of Esme it was understandable. Now I may be shy and awkward talking to grown-ups for the first time – or two – but children I could do, they were my niche! I slowly crouched down at the side of the bed and folded my arms on the mattress.

"Hi, I'm Bella, what's your name?" I asked her softly, she looked up at Edward seeking permission to talk to me, he nodded slightly and smiled at her.

"Ewizabef," she whispered quietly.

"Wow, what a really pretty name, I had a doll called Elizabeth when I was a little girl, but she didn't have your beautiful green eyes, hers were brown like mine," I told her just as quietly.

"Barnacle has bwown eyes," she offered,

"And who is Barnacle?" I was surprised that she was talking to me, it can take children a while to warm up to new people and after what Lizzy had been through I really thought it would take some coxing.

"He's my seahorse, he's free like me," she held up three fingers showing me how old she was. I couldn't help the grin that spread across my face, she was too cute for words.

"Wow, you're three? That's really big," I widened my eyes in mock astonishment earning the little giggle I was hoping for, she yawned loudly instantly grabbing Edwards attention, watching him with her was making my heart flutter madly in my chest.

"How are you feeling, sweetheart, would you like anything?" he asked her gently, running his hand through her hair again.

"Can I have a dwink, pweez, daddy?" I stood quickly, moving out of his way and passed him the pink sippy cup that was on the cupboard next to her bed, he smiled his sexy crooked smile, that I haven't seen since high school and took the cup from me – I, on the other hand, almost fainted.

Finally plucking up the courage I decided to go over a see Masen.

"Do you mind?" I asked Edward, pointing in the direction of the incubator over the other side of the room, no-one was stood there now as Rosalie – the tall beautiful blonde that Edward had introduced as Emmett's wife had rushed out of the room after her husband.

"No, of course not," he told me quietly. I nodded and slowly walked over to the tiny infant.

The first thing I noticed was the heat lamp at the top of the incubator keeping him warm, I noticed that first as I was delaying looking at Masen. I closed my eyes and took a calming breath – _how does Edward face seeing his son like this? _It must be killing him. I opened my eyes and looked at his tiny form, I knew he was small, I'd held him against my chest last night, but seeing him in just a diaper that almost buried him, I was still shocked at how little he really was. Alice had told me that his had lost almost two pounds from his birth weight and _that _alone was terrifying. His eyes were closed and he wore a small blue hat, he had patches on his chest monitoring his heartbeat, two tubes in his mouth – a large one that I knew was feeding him oxygen and a smaller one that was more than likely just _feeding _him – He had a blood oxygen monitor strapped to his tiny foot and two IV's – one in his other foot and another in his hand. _Had he really been that close to death last night?_ Obviously so! I stood there for a minute, silent tears falling from my eyes as I watched his chest rise and fall with the oxygen that was being forced into his body. I felt strong arms wrap around my waist from behind and I didn't need to look up to know that it was Edward, an electrical hum always seemed to buzz around him. He rested his chin on my head and sighed, I couldn't take it any more – why did this feel like we were watching over _our _son? I turned quickly and buried my head in his chest and sobbed, one of his hands went instantly to my hair and the other wrapped tighter around my waist, he smelt amazing, even after being in the hospital for hours and on a flight for God knows how long. I felt so guilty that he was comforting _me_ when in reality I should be the one doing the comforting. And suddenly I was, he buried his face in my hair and I felt, hot tears that didn't belong to me, running down my face, his whole body shook with sobs and I tightened my arms around is waist offering what comfort I could.

"I'm so sorry," I whispered. I don't know how long we stood there like that but it felt like an eternity, when we eventually separated he smiled a sad smile down at me and whispered a quiet apology for breaking down like that.

"Don't be sorry, if you need someone besides family to talk to or a shoulder to cry on I'm here," I promised him. We pulled away completely as Alice raced into the room and I noticed that everyone except Esme was back in the room.

"I found him, the manager at the Triftway is sending someone over with him, Bella strikes again," she announced excitedly, I of coursed blushed. Lizzy was sleeping again so she would get a wonderful surprise when she woke up.

I suddenly realised that in all of the haze of the last fourteen hours I had failed to tell my Mom or Dad where I was, my Dad I wasn't too worried about, I only spoke to him about once a fortnight but my Mom would be out of her mind with worry. I'd had to turn my phone off when I came in to the ER last night and hadn't turned it back on. I quickly turned to Edward.

"I'm really sorry, but do you know if there is somewhere I can use my phone, I've not told my parents where I am, and I know that my Mom will be worried." I felt so juvenile and inconsiderate asking this, the Cullen's were going through so much and here I was worried about getting in to trouble with my Mom.

"There is nothing to be sorry for, you can use it in the canteen, I'll show you where it is if you like," I shook my head quickly.

"No, you stay here with Lizzy and Masen, I'm sure I'll find it." I told him, there was no way that I was dragging him away from his children again.

"I could use a coffee anyway, I'll show you where it is," Rosalie offered, everyone in the room looked at her as if she had two heads and I was just about to tell her that it was okay I didn't mind finding my own way, when she spoke again. "Will you all stop looking at me like that, I was going to offer you all coffee but you can get your own now, come on, Bella." she hooked her arm in the crook of my elbow and all but dragged me out of the room. I was extremely grateful that I still had my purse over my shoulder with my phone in it as I was too intimidated by Rosalie to ask for time to grab it out of my bag.

We passed a confused looking Esme in the hallway who quickly pressed a cold compress into my hands on her way past and offered me a warm smile.

"You are coming back aren't you, Bella?" she asked worriedly

"Of course, I'm just going to make a phone call," I promised her, she smiled again squeezed my hand and went on her way. Rosalie was quiet until we got to the stairwell, I was confused as to why she wasn't using the elevator but as she pulled me through the door and stopped me I understood that she wanted to talk and I didn't know whether to be worried or not.

Rosalie took a minute to organise her thoughts before she spoke and when she did I was surprised by how quiet her voice had become after the way she had spoken to everyone else.

"I'm just going to come out and say this and if you tell anyone I will deny it and gladly beat you around the head. I don't like many people, and those I do I take a long while to warm up to, I have my reasons for that and I really don't want to get into them right now but. . .I. . .well you're alright in my book, Bella Swan, what you did last night was fucking amazing! The Cullen's mean the world to me, Edward in-particular and that guy has been through so much shit over the last few years because of that whore, but what she did to those kiddies is fucking sick and we both know that if you hadn't have stopped her last night both of them would be dead right now, so thank you, but know that if you hurt him I _will _fuck you up. Now lets get that coffee." I stared after her for a second as she stormed down the stairs, "Well? Are you coming or not," I couldn't stop myself as laughter bubbled up in my chest – I think I just made a new friend. I pushed off the wall I was leaning on and followed her down the stairs still chuckling to myself, she smiled and winked at me before flipping her long blond hair over her shoulder and carrying on her way.

"Mom, I promise you I'm fine. I really don't want to go into any details with you right now, but I'll call you tomorrow," I insisted, she had been going on at me for the last ten minutes about how she was worried sick when she couldn't get hold of me, she had been to my apartment and had even called Jack. You would think that I had been missing for weeks not a few hours, it was only two o'clock in the afternoon for God sake. Okay part of me felt guilty that I had worried her but I'm twenty seven not twelve, God help us all when I move back to Seattle.

"Bella, what the hell is going on, please just tell me. I'm going out of my mind here." Ugh!

"Mom, look, I'm sorry that you were worried, but It's only been like, five hours that you haven't been able to get hold for me for, I will explain everything when I come and see you on Sunday but for now know that I _am _fine and I'll talk to you tomorrow," I was going round in fucking circles.

"Fine, but if I haven't heard from you by this time tomorrow, there will be trouble young lady," I rolled my eyes and Rosalie chucked from where she sat across the table from me in the hospital canteen. I lifted my head up from my hands and smiled at her.

"Fine, talk to you tomorrow," I hung up quickly before she could go on yet another rant and quickly turned off my phone "Sorry about that," I apologised.

"Don't worry about it, I've been married to Emmett for three years now and my Mom is still like that, I'm sure she just loves you," she offered pushing a now luke warm coffee over to me. I'd offered to pick up some lunch for everyone but Rosalie insisted that Alice had ordered sandwiches in for us all – me included – and that they would be here in the next thirty minutes or so.

"Emmett and I will be heading to a hotel after lunch and probably won't be back until later tonight or tomorrow, will you be around?" Rosalie asked me as we climbed into the elevator on our way back up the the ICU.

"Yeah, hopefully, I don't want to get in the way so I'll be going home later but if Edward doesn't mind I'll come back in the morning to see how everyone is," I told her, I really wanted to just camp out in the hospital all night, but I'm sure that the Cullen's needed some family time.

"You're not in the way Bella, I can promise you that. We'll be back around nine in the morning with breakfast if I can temp you?" she offered with a smile.

"Well, if it really is okay with Edward, then I'll be here." I promised. The doors to the elevator opened and we were instantly hit with a loud beeping sound that continuously rang out through the hall way. I looked down the corridor to see the majority of the Cullen's in stood there. Rosalie and I raced off in their direction, the beeping getting louder. Alice had her face buried in Jaspers chest, Carlisle had his head in his hands and Emmett was staring wide eyed into Lizzy and Masen room. I followed his gaze to see Edward sat on a chair beside Lizzy's bed gripping onto her tiny hand for dear life and his head resting on the bed, his whole body was shaking violently as Esme stood behind him, one hand rubbing circles on his shoulder and tears running down her face. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and turned to see three or four doctors crowded around Masen Incubator – the constant beeping continued.

"What's going on," Rosalie demanded, Jasper lifter his head from the top of Alice's and looked over at us, the heartbroken look in his eyes instantly turned my stomach.

"Masen flat lined," he whispered.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hi all and welcome to chapter 6 - I would like to say a big thank you to all of you that I reviewed. I haven't had a chance to reply yet but I promise to get to it ASAP. I got the writing bug and have also updated First Light for those of you that have requested an update thank you. I will be starting chapter 7 tonight - lets see if I can get it out by chapter 5's Tuesday deadline - I would think that maybe 50 reviews will be motivation enough (cheeky I know, but i'm doing so well with my updates *puppy dog eyes*)**

**I hope you enjoy (and I promise not as big a cliffy at the end of this chapter)**

EPOV

Chapter 6

I stood looking over the empty incubator that had housed my son, willing the memories and the pain to subside. I was slowly coming to terms with what had happened and after long talks with my mom and dad, Rose, Alice and even Bella I knew that all of the events of the last four weeks rested solely on Tanya's shoulders – that knowledge didn't ease the pain or the guilt though.

Just over four weeks ago I was pacing the hallways of Seattle General waiting for my second child to come into the world, I was forbidden to be in the room when either of my children had been born, I had been refused time and again to feel their movements when Tanya was pregnant and my family had been banned from being at the hospital at all – which was why, up until they arrived in Jacksonville, I was the only member of my family that had even seen Masen and even I had only seen him through the nursery window. In four weeks I had gained a son, lost him, found him and now I was preparing to say goodbye to him once again.

Lizzy, who – in the last seven days – had _physically_ healed without too many problems, held on to my neck for dear life, the small bald patch on the back of her head and a few yellowing bruises the only sign of what she had been through. Emotionally it was another story completely, we'd had a psychiatrist flown down for Seattle five days ago and Doctor Siobhan Ireland – a long time friend of my parents – had explained that Lizzy was dealing with a sever case of separation anxiety not only from myself but from Masen also, who she had felt the need to protect during the three weeks that they had been with Tanya. The last six days without Masen by her side had been exceptionally hard on her.

"There you are, everyone is waiting for you at the back entrance," Bella announced from the doorway, she had been a Godsend over the past week – aside from when she first saw Masen and again after he. . .flat lined, I hadn't seen Bella cry, she had been a rock for anyone and everyone who needed a shoulder to cry on, she had helped in anyway she could, from getting coffee to help making arrangements, she had barley been home at all, it was only when Alice dragged her there yesterday to finish packing her things for her move to Seattle that she agreed to leave the hospital. It took some begging and pleading from Alice but we managed to get Bella to agree to fly back to Seattle with us on our private jet.

"Yeah, sorry, I was just making sure we had everything," I lied, she offered me a small smile seeing straight through my lie.

"Hi, Bewwa," Lizzy whispered raising her head slightly to look at Bella.

"Hey, pumpkin," she whispered back walking into the room, "Are you excited to be going home?"

"Yeah, but I wish Masen could come with us," Lizzy said quietly, the pining that she had for her brother was something that Doctor Masters was working on.

"I know you do, sweetheart," I whispered kissing her head.

"The car arrived five minutes ago and Irena asked if we could get going as soon as possible before the press realise that you're leaving," she told me apologeticly. Irena was the PR executive for Cullen Pharmaceuticals and she had flown down with Doctor Ireland to help deal with all the press that had congregated outside of he hospital.

"Are the paramedics here yet?" I asked shifting Lizzy to my hip and following Bella out of the ICU.

"Yeah, the doctors are just getting everything set up for transportation," she rubbed her hand down my arm in comfort and offered me a reassuring smile, it was never pity that I could see in her eyes when she looked at me like that, it was understanding. Being here almost 24/7 for the past week, Bella had seen first hand how exhausting it had become trying to divide my time between Lizzy – who was experiencing panic attacks each time I left her side – and going up to the NICU where Masen had been moved to after the scare we'd had when he flat lined on Thursday afternoon. Now was one of those times, Lizzy would be flying with us to Seattle and coming home to sleep in her own bed tonight, Masen on the other had was being flown to Seattle via Air Ambulance directly to the NICU at Seattle General so that he could remain wired to his monitors.

We walked in silence to the elevator, goodbye's and thank you's had already been said to the staff and I was on pins, anxious to see Masen before he was transported to the airfield in the ambulance. Over all he was doing well, he was gaining on average an ounce a day, his oxygen had been reduced to ten percent and was now being given through a nasal tube rather than the thick pipe that had been placed down his throat. The antibiotics that he was on had more or less rid his body of infection and the blisters on his bottom were healing nicely. The only thing he really wasn't doing was feeding so he still required the feeding tube, the rest of his monitors were – at this point – just a precaution and we were hopeful that he would be home with us in the next seven to ten days.

"Took you long enough, what were you doing spring cleaning the place?" Rose asked as we approached the back exit of the hospital, I just rolled my eyes and Bella laughed from beside me – a strange friendship had formed between the two of them this week, nobody really knew what to make of it, Rose was a tough cookie who didn't take kindly to new people, she was ferociously protective of her family, and that included us – maybe that was it, Bella appeared to be just as protective, of the children especially, maybe they found a kinship there?

Maggie – a neonatal nurse from Seattle General – was stood to one side talking to the paramedics that were waiting to transport Masen, Irena was typing away on her blackberry and my mom and Alice where already seated in the limo waiting to leave. My dad, Emmett and Jasper had all flown back to Seattle a couple of days ago to ensure that all was still running smoothly at the office leaving me to fly home in a plane full of estrogen – _wonderful!_

_ "_Everything is set, Mr Cullen, Doctor Snow will be down with Masen any minute and then we're ready to leave," Maggie told me as she approached where Bella, Lizzy the Spider Monkey and I stood.

"Thank you, Maggie. I'll be going straight to the hospital from the airport so I will probably be there before you," I told her, the jet that we were travelling in would be faster then the air ambulance.

"Of course, Mr Cullen – Doctor Gerandi is expecting you, oh here they are now," she said looking over my shoulder. I followed her gaze to see Masen being wheeled out of the hospital by Doctor Snow and two nurses from the neonatal unit and I quickly made my way over to them before they could put Masen in the ambulance, I smiled at the hospital staff but the main focus of my attention was in the incubator they were pushing.

"Hey, 'lil man," I whispered as I reached my free hand through one of the windows on the side to gently stroke Masen's cheek. It didn't happen very often, but right now his light blue – almost turquoise – eyes were open, taking in what he could see of the world around him.

"Hi, Masen," Lizzy chirped, excited to see her brother, my mom, Alice and Rose all made their way over to see him before he was lifted into the ambulance.

"You be a good boy, okay, Masen and nanna and pops will come see you tomorrow," my mom whispered as she kissed the tips of her fingers and reached in to place them on his cheek. Alice, Rose and Bella all said their goodbyes to Masen and climbed into the limo while I stood with Lizzy still in my arms to watch him being loaded into the ambulance before climbing into the car myself.

The plane ride was more or less uneventful, I even managed to separate Lizzy from me for half an hour while my mom read her a story, giving me a chance for the first time in a week to check my emails. Dad and my PA, Heidi had done a great job – not that I would expect anything less of my dad, he had been in control of Cullen Pharmaceuticals for almost thirty years when I took over. There was a board meeting on Monday that I would have to attend and a meeting with the Heath Secretary regarding the vaccinations for the H1N1 virus – or swine flu as its more commonly known – later next week.

"That's a really beautiful necklace by the way, Alice, I keep meaning to tell you, but then something happens and it slips my mind," I heard Bella say from where she was sat across the aisle from me, opposite Alice. Alice, who was facing me caught my eye and smirked slightly as she ran a finger and thumb across the necklace – _oh shit what is she up to? _The only relief I had that she wouldn't tell Bella the story behind it was that my mom and Lizzy were in earshot.

The necklace that Bella was referring to, was a platinum and diamond choker and wasn't in fact a necklace at all – it was a collar. Alice – aside from being his wife – is Jaspers sub, not something I was too thrilled about when they told me they were dating, but who am I to judge?

"Thanks, Bella. Jasper gave it to me, oh about six years ago, not long after we started _dating, _I never take it off – not that I could, Jasper has the key." she winked at Bella who frowned for a second and then blushed the most alarming shade of red, her eyes widening slightly as she looked from Alice's face to the collar and – so briefly I would have missed it had I not been watching for her reaction – her eye flicked to me. _Did she know? _

"Um, well yeah, it's really beautiful," she stuttered squirming slightly in her seat. I don't know what surprised me more, Alice's openness in hinting what the choker represented – her and Jasper kept their lifestyle as hush-hush as I did – or Bella's obvious and almost instant awareness.

I hadn't had a collard sub in four and a half years, I'd never collard Tanya and really didn't ever class her as a sub – she was merely an inconvenience – and for obvious reasons, as soon as she told me that she was pregnant with Lizzy any play that we had engaged in – and I use the term _play _extremely lightly – ceased and I was grateful for that, not only did it mean that any sexual contact with Tanya could stop, it also freed me of my contracted obligation to continue as her Dom and therefore giving me the green light to partake in scenes elsewhere. Yes _my _playroom door may have been locked but others were very much still open. Unattached subs were plentiful in Seattle and more than one or two were willing to scene with me at the exclusive club I frequented once or twice a month, or any play party I took part in, I also still attended the occasional munch and had even participated in a a few sessions with Peter and Charlotte. It had been six weeks since my last scene, a demonstration on whipping technique with Tia. Tia was an excellent sub, she had trained in Egypt under a very strict Dom named Amun, and she barley ever put a foot wrong, always respectful, always willing, which was perfect for my situation, I didn't have the time necessary for punishments or training.

The second sub I had collared – Carmen – had come to me as _fresh-meat _having never been a sub before, I was still in college at the time so she only served me every other weekend, but our agreement lasted for three years and oh, the fun I had training her! That was the thrill of being a Dom for me, moulding and training the perfect submissive and I was extremely proud of her – and myself – when I introduced her to her new Dom, Eleazar just before I moved back to Seattle. I still get the occasional email from both of them even though they are no longer active in the community with Carmen having given birth to their second child six months ago.

With the tension of the past four weeks, I was almost in desperate need of release, but I knew that there was no way I would have the time to visit the club, what with Masen still being in the hospital and Lizzy being joined to my hip. I groaned in frustration causing Bella to look over in my direction she smiled and silently asked if I was okay, I merely nodded and offered her a small smile in return. _Was I okay?_ No, not really. I've said it before and I'll say it again – Lizzy and Masen are my life, not the life I ever expected but not one I would give up for the world. That didn't mean that _I_ still didn't have need's though, Lizzy and Masen had brought out a softer side in me but my inner Dom was itching to get out. Could I ever go back to having a D/s relationship with someone? How would that work with two children in the house? Could I unlock the playroom door? I didn't have the answer to any of those questions but they weren't the most prominent questions, the questions that I had asked myself almost constantly over the last seven days – no – the ones I desperately wanted answers to held more than one question mark at the end. Would Bella ever consider becoming my submissive? If so would our relationship be more then just D/s? If not could I ever consider a vanilla relationship with her? And how in the hell did I approacher her about something like this? There was no doubt in my mind that I wanted Bella, I'd wanted her when we were in high school together and I really felt that seeing her again – especially with the way she had come back into my life – was some sort of karma and that I'd be stupid not to take the opportunity to explore the electricity that seems to flow between us. Maybe the biggest question that I should be asking myself was whether or not Bella had any feelings for me at all!

I shook my head, I didn't need to be thinking of this right now, what kind of father was I, sat on a plane returning home from a hospital in Florida with a emotionally sick child and another one close by in an air ambulance, while I'm sporting the worlds biggest boner over fantasies of fucking their saviour senseless in my playroom? _A sick one, that's what! _My inner daddy screamed at me.

I only spent an hour in the NICU at Seattle General, just long enough to see Masen settled and to ensure that the bodyguard I had arranged for him was stationed outside the room and familiar with who was – and more importantly – who wasn't, allowed near him. It may seem a little OTT to some people for a four week only baby to have a bodyguard, but for me it was a must. Tanya was still out there somewhere and as I now had Lizzy at home and would be back in work next week, I wouldn't be able to be here as often as I wanted to be. Lizzy and Angela had a bodyguard of their own also, I just couldn't risk loosing them again.

Getting Lizzy to agree to go back home to my house with my mom had been difficult to say the least, Doctor Ireland had been there – thank God – and had insisted that I be gently but firm with her, letting her know that I understood that she was scared, reassuring her that I would be back – and by what time – but being resolute with my decision to follow Masen to the hospital, had Doctor Ireland not been there I don't know whether or not I would have been able to go through with it. All of the girls had tears in their eyes as my mom was forced to pry Lizzy – kicking a screaming – from around my neck. I felt like a bastard, and I don't think my mom felt any better, but Doctor Ireland is the expert so no matter how much it hurts me, I have to follow her her advice – it is, after all, what we are paying her for! So after saying a quick goodbye to Bella, Alice and Rose, I climbed into a separate car and headed to the hospital.

When I walked in through my front door at six thirty that night I was mentally, emotionally and physically drained. I'd been sleeping in a recliner at the hospital in Florida for the past seven nights, never getting more than a few hours in at a time, but when Lizzy came bouncing into the room covered in flour, tugging a beaming Angela behind her the exhaustion all but melted away.

"Daddy, you're howm, we baked you sowm cookies," she yelled in all her childish enthusiasm, the trauma of our separation long forgotten.

"You did? Well you know how much I love your cookies, I can't wait to try them," I told her as I scooped her up into my arms. I'd found it just has hard as she did being away from each other. It was just as hard being away from Masen.

"Yep, cowm see," she begged, bouncing in my arms, chuckling I set her back on her feet and allowed her to drag me towards the kitchen, where the delicious aroma of warm cookies hung in the air.

"How are you? How Masen,? Angela asked walking beside me, I sighed.

"Masen is fine, great really, hopefully he will be home at the end of next week, me? I'm shattered,"I told her honestly. Angela was a wonderful person, she'd been with us since Lizzy was born and had become a good friend.

"Yeah, I was gonna say that you look like crap, but well, you pay my wages," she laughed lightly. My mom was at the counter in the kitchen chucking to herself having heard our conversation.

"You'll do well to remember that," I ribbed, nudging her shoulder with mine, purposefully making her stumble to the side slightly, we were more like siblings than employer and employee.

"Jerk," she muttered under her breath as she righted herself. I was so grateful that Angela hadn't asked about out time in Florida, we had kept in touch while we were there so she was up to speed on Lizzy and Masen's progress, I think she just knew that we wanted to put it all behind us as best we could. I laughed again and messed up her hair before leaning over the counter to kiss my mom on the forehead, attempting to hind the fact that I was snatching a cookie off the baking sheet – of course that plan backfired.

"Ow, shi-uger lumps," I caught myself before the profanity slipped out in front of Lizzy, dropping the cookie back onto the counter, my finger now throbbed like a bitch, the cookies had obviously _just_ come out of the oven.

"Their hot, daddy," Lizzy told me, stating the obvious.

"I know that _now,_" I growled playfully, "You're suppose to look out for your old man and tell him things like that,"

"Siwwy, daddy, you're aspost to ask firwst," she chastised waving her little index finger at me. I suppressed the smile that was trying to slip out, ignoring my mom and Angela giggling at me being reprimand by my three year old daughter and planted the best pout I could on my lips.

"Please can I have a cookie, Lizzy?" I asked in my best puppy dog voice, she didn't fall for it – she'd learn that from my mom!

"When they've coowed down," she told me.

"Okay, princess, how about I take you for a bath while they cool and then we can both have milk and cookies before you go to sleep," I offered.

"Can I sweep wive you?" she asked in a small voice, luckily I had already discussed this with Doctor Ireland.

"You can, but just tonight okay, princess, then tomorrow you need to sleep in your own bed, okay?" I knew that we would be having this conversation again tomorrow and the night after and the night after but Doctor Ireland had _reluctantly_ agreed to allow Lizzy into my bed tonight, I knew that she would ask.

"Okay," she whispered,

Angela excused herself for the night, although she is live-in, she clocks off when I get home from work – unless in the past I had been going out, regardless of the fact that Tanya was here. Okay, it was because Tanya was here that Angela had agreed to live-in in the first place – and she goes about her night how ever she sees fit, she has here own suite/apartment above the garages. My mom kissed us both goodnight and headed home to my dad in the car that had brought her here earlier and I took Lizzy up to my bathroom for her nightly soak in the tub.

As always bath-time was eventful, with me ending up almost as wet as Lizzy, so after quickly changing myself into some lounge pants and a t-shirt I dressed Lizzy – who had been running round my room butt-naked – into her lilac P_rincess and the Frog _PJ's and climbed into my bed for the first time in a week and after munching on our cookies and drinking our milk, just like the nights before she was taken, she sprawled out across my chest, her leg over my waist and her head resting over my heart as I read her the the latest adventure of Arial, Sebastian and Flounder. Lizzy passed out before I had even finished the first two pages – emotionally and physically exhausted herself. I lay there for a while, just listening to her breathing and running my fingers through her bronzed curls and although I was tired it was still early and my mind was swamped with unanswered questions. Sighing quietly, I slid from underneath Lizzy and after climbing out of bed I pulled open the top draw of my bedside table and stared at the small silver key that resided there – maybe it was time to unlock my playroom!


	7. Chapter 7

**Hi All and welcome to chapter 7 of Karma. Hope you enjoy, please let me know what you think!**

**on another note - I have a poll of my profile page with regards to First Light so please check it out and let me know how you want that story to play out.**

**thanks**

**Vik**

BPOV

Chapter 7

I felt my eyes widen and my cheeks inflame with a scorching hot blush as I looked from Alice's mischievous face to the necklace – that's not a necklace at all but a _collar –_ that hung at the base of her throat. I couldn't stop myself from taking a quick peek at Edward only to dart my eyes away quickly when I noticed that he was watching us from his seat across the aisle.

I felt like such an idiot, I _knew _that Jasper was a Dom in high school, Jake had told me that it was Edward and his blond friend that were going to Seattle almost every weekend training to _beat the shit out of woman,_ as he put it, but knowing that Alice and Jasper were married, and the way she seemed to wear the pants in their relationship I wrongly presumed he'd given up that way of life.

Alice was smirking at me and I had the awful feeling that she knew that I knew, I sighed internally.

"Um, well yeah, it's really beautiful," I told her and quickly turned back to the book that I was reading, it was the third book in the _Twilight Saga_ and it was my favourite one so far, Alice had given me the first one to read at the hospital and I'd rushed to the book store across the street to get the other three after finishing the first one in a two days. It probably helped that the Vampire in the book was called Edward and the writer had almost described _my _Edward to a tee. _My Edward? Keep dreaming girlfriend!_

Anyway, even the fact that Vampire Edward had just hitched his leading lady's leg over his hip, I was still just sat staring at the page, not really seeing anything at all, no, I was wondering if Alice was someone that I could talk to about my little problem in finding myself a Dom, but I had no idea how to approach her with a question like that. I think that we have established that the Dom I actually want was sitting five feet away from me, but I didn't know if he even did that any more – was it something that you just grew out of or was it like a natural baser instinct? Was it a part of his life that he'd had to push to one side when the children came into his life? Is there any way I could ask _him_ to train me? Did I really want to do that with anyone other than him? I didn't think so but alas, I was going round in fucking circles but I just didn't have the nerve to ask either one of them about it.

A groan came from Edwards direction and I looked over and smiled at him.

"You okay?" I mouthed, Lizzy was just nodding off on Esme's knee and I didn't want to disturb her, he nodded and offered me a weak smile in response. It was obvious how the stress of the last few weeks had worn on him, not that he was any less beautiful for it, but he look exhausted and frustrated – if the tugging at his hair was anything to go by – and he still had so much to do when he got home. First there was seeing that Masen was okay and comfortable at Seattle General, then there was settling Lizzy back into there home and the separation anxiety that she is suffering, not to mention the fact that he was working with Jasper to get Tanya's rights stripped and finally he was returning to work on Monday and I wouldn't even like to imagine how much stress comes with being the CEO of a multi-billion dollar company.

What I wouldn't give to be able to relieve him of some of his stress – and no I don't mean in _that_ way – okay maybe I do, but I just wished that there was someway for me to help him.

The plane touched down, so I quickly put my book back in my bag and stood, stretching my legs for the first time in six hours, Edward had taken Lizzy back from Esme about an hour before and was walking just ahead of me as we climbed off the plane.

There were two limos waiting for us on the tarmac – how the other half lived – one that was going to take Edward to Seattle General and the other was taking us girls back to our respective houses, well _back_ for the rest of them, this would be my first time stepping inside my new apartment and I was really excited about that.

As the drivers unloaded our luggage and stowed it in the trunks Doctor Ireland made her way over to Edward, I couldn't hear what they were saying but by the pained look on Edwards face it wasn't good.

"What's going on?" I asked Rose as I went to stand with her, Esme and Alice.

"I think that she is just making sure he knows how to handle sending Lizzy back with Esme, this is the first time that she is going to be actually taken away from him since he arrived at the hospital, it was bad enough when he was just nipping down to see Masen, I think this is going to be a million time worse," she told me, I could see the concern in her eyes, this was going to be hard on everyone.

Edward walked over to where we were standing, Lizzy still clinging desperately to his neck, he stopped and untangled her arms and legs before placing her on the ground and crouching to her level.

"Daddy is just gonna nip to the hospital to see that Mas got there okay, Nanna will take you home and I will see you there in two hours," he told her calmly.

"No, no, no," Lizzy cried shaking her head, "I cowm wive you,"

"You can't come with me Lizzy, you need to go home with Nanna, Angela is there and she is really looking forward to seeing you," I could see the pain in his eyes and Lizzy had tears streaming down her face, I stepped away, not wanting to make him do this in front of an audience and was grateful that Rose and Alice followed.

"Oh, God I can't watch that," Alice cried wiping away her own tears, "How he is doing it I will _never_ know,"

"They will both be fine, Doctor Ireland knows what she's doing," Rose told her.

"I know that, but it doesn't make it any easier," Alice snapped back.

"Retract the claws, Ali, I'm not saying that it does I'm just pointing out that although it's hard to watch and more than likely harder to do, it's for the best, she needs to learn that she can't always be with him, what is going to happen on Monday when he has to go back into the office if he doesn't start making her spend time without him now?" Rose demanded, the tension in the air was thick, emotions were flying, these past few weeks had been a nightmare for the Cullen's and it wasn't about to get easier any time soon.

"Nooo. . .Dadddyyy. . .Daddddyyy . . .noo. . .nooo. . .Daaddyy cowm baaack" Lizzy suddenly wailed and I thought I was going to throw up. I quickly followed after Rose and Alice as they made there way to where Esme was struggling to keep hold of a fighting Lizzy as Edward – practically being dragged by Doctor Ireland – walked away and climbed into the back of his waiting car.

"Lizzy, sweetheart, daddy will be back in two hours just like he promised, Lizzy, please Nanna is going to drop you, please sweetheart," Lizzy was still trying to fight her way out of Esme's arms, Esme was fighting tears.

"Elizabeth Isabella Cullen, stop this right now," Rose demanded taking her from Esme, Rose was stronger and more able to deal with the fighting. The authority in her voice startled Lizzy and she instantly stopped fighting but then the sobbing started as she buried her beautiful face in Rose's shoulder.

I was a little startled myself, not only by Rose yelling – yeah she was _that _scary – but by the fact that Lizzy's middle name was Isabella, would it be conceited of me to wonder if he had thought of me when he had named her, and how had Tanya felt about that? Yeah it probably was conceited but it still made me smile.

"Come on, little one, lets get you home," Esme cooed taking Lizzy back and silently thanking Rose.

"I ww-want mm-my d-daddy," Lizzy sobbed quietly causing my heart to clench once again, I had to sit on my hands as I climbed into the car, to stop myself from reaching over and taking her from Esme so that I could mother her myself.

"I know you do sweetheart, he'll be back soon, I promise, okay?" Esme told her as she ran her fingers through Lizzy's soft bronze hair.

Lizzy fell asleep within five minutes, having exhausted herself during her episode so we pretty much sat in silence on the way over to my apartment. I was the first drop as everyone else lived over on Bainbridge Island.

We pulled up in front of my new apartment block and I couldn't help but smile, my apartment wasn't big by any stretch of the imagination, but the building itself was just what I hopped it would be. I had sacrificed the square footage for the location.

It was just outside of the city in, Beacon Hill, about a twenty minutes drive to work, the building itself had just finished construction and I'd managed to snag myself a one bedroom apartment for nine hundred dollars a month – a little more that what I was used to paying but it was manageable.

"This looks really great, Bella," Alice said sweetly, "Do you need a hand with your things?" she offered

"No, I'll be fine, thank you though, you need to get this little girl home," I told her honestly. I only had one bag with me, the rest of my things should already be waiting for me and I was sure that Esme would have a dead arm by now.

"Okay, if your sure, but give me a call tomorrow and we can go and grab a coffee or something," she said hopefully.

"I'd really like that, will you join us Rose, Esme?" I was going to really miss being around everyone.

"I'd love to but I'm working tomorrow, we'll get together soon though," Rose said hugging me.

"You two girls have some fun tomorrow without mom hanging around, but come over for dinner on Sunday, we always have a family get together and we haven't done it for a few weeks for obvious reasons," Esme said as she continued to rub Lizzy back soothingly.

After hugging and kissing everyone and promising Esme that I would be at the Cullen estate for lunch on Sunday, I reluctantly slid out of the car, the driver had already taken my bag to the door way and handed it to the security guard so I thanked him and turned to wave the others off.

Opening the door to my new apartment should have felt exhilarating, but I suddenly felt really lonely, spending the last seven days with the Cullen's had been none stop, there was always someone hanging around, be it Emmett in all his boisterousness or Carlisle with his classic charm or Edward in all his fuck-hottedness – I don't think that's a word but it should be and there should be a picture of Edward Cullen next to it in the dictionary.

I dumped my lone bag by the door and wondered around the apartment. The living, dining and kitchen areas all made up the main room, there was a small breakfast bar that spilt the space and that would be enough for me for to dine at for the time being. The apartment came unfurnished so one of my first tasks this week would be shopping to fill the small space.

I turned and followed the short hallway – that I knew from the floor plan I had seen – that lead to the one bedroom and the only bathroom. The bathroom door was open so I walked in, it was clean, new and very modern, there was no bath tub but there was a large walk in shower, a toilet – obviously – and a sink below a large vanity mirror. I quickly did my business before tying my hair back with the bobble I kept around my wrist and splashed my face with water, the rest of me would have to wait until morning, it was still early but I was on Florida time and after a week spent in the hospital I was in desperate need of a good night sleep – well as good a night sleep as I would be able to have on an air mattress.

Walking into my bedroom, I noticed that – as requested – my belongings had been placed by the walk in closet. I made my way over and dug through the box marked _bedroom_ and pulled out my blow up bed. I didn't have the energy to blow it up myself, so I found my hairdryer and after selecting the coolest setting I set to work in readying my bed for the next few nights, it didn't take long but while I set there I couldn't stop my mind from turning back to Edward, wondering what he was doing now, if he had got Masen settled, whether Lizzy was okay. I was really missing him and the children, well I was missing everyone, but the three of them held a special place in my heart.

Sighing, I shut off the hairdryer and quickly plugged the hole in the mattress to stop the air from escaping and lay the bed up against the centre wall, pulled some bedding out of the open bedroom box and draped it over the air bed. I couldn't bring myself to do anything else so I simply slipped down to my panties and all but fell into bed.

I regretted not making the effort to find something to cover the windows the following morning, when at seven o'clock the sunlight that was streaming through the clear, uncovered glass, spread across my face, rousing me from my slumber. Although I had slept for over twelve hours, I wasn't quite ready to wake up. I groaned and buried my head back under the quilt, trying desperately to go back to sleep but it was no use, I was awake now and I had so much to do – starting with finding coffee!

I literally crawled out of bed and over to the box's to try and find my dressing gown, it took me almost five minutes to find it lying underneath a spare pillow in the third box I searched. I hadn't put the heat on when I arrived so it was pretty chilling in the apartment, I was actually surprised to see the sun shining in Seattle in the middle of March and I gladly took it as an omen of good things to come. This was a new start for me, new job, new friends. . .new boyfriend?

I didn't have a great track record in dating, my first disaster was Mike Newton who I dated for a few months during my senior year of high school, he was one guy that didn't have a problem with the little extra weight that I still carried and when he asked me to the spring dance I jumped at the chance. I was young and stupid and didn't realise that Mike thought that because I would be so thankful to him for asking me out, I would give up the goods – he was of course wrong, and I'm not so sure he will ever be able to have children after my knee was formally introduced to his groin. Next was Eric Yorkie, he was short, with bad skin and greasy black hair, we dated in College, but it only took me two weeks to realise that chess clubs were _not _my thing.

Finally there was Riley, he was a nice guy and we were together for two and a half years but there was _that_ something missing, Edward Cullen and his lifestyle was constantly on my mind, and in all of the time that we were together I never achieved an orgasm, I fear that I am the only twenty seven year old in the whole of the US who has never been able to get off, either by my hand or someone else's!

I was snapped out of my trip down memory lane when the intercom suddenly rang, almost scaring the life out of me, I rushed out of my bedroom, wrapping my dressing gown around me and grabbed the intercom phone off the wall.

"Hello," I said breathlessly, I really needed to find a gym here.

"Miss Swan, this is Paul at the front desk, I have Mrs Alice Whitlock here to see you." I looked at my watch double checking that it was only just after seven in the morning – it was! What the _hell _was Alice doing here at this time?

"Um, okay you can send her up," I told him reluctantly, I _was_ happy that I was going to see Alice, just not at the crack of fucking dawn! I hung up and contemplated finding something to wear, but decided against it, she could take me as she found me – bed head and all.

Three sharp raps on the door announced her arrival and I shuffled my way over to let her in.

"Good morning, sunshine," she chirped wrapping one of her tiny arms around me, the other I was ecstatic to see, cradled two cups of streaming hot coffee.

"Morning, Alice – what brings you by so early?" I asked closing the door and following her into the kitchen area. "Sorry I don't have anywhere for you to sit," I shrugged.

"And that, my dear is what brings me here – shopping of course." she trilled. I rolled my eyes and took hold of the coffee cup that she was waving in my face.

"Thanks, I needed this," I told her sighing as took my first sip of the peace offering she brought me. "Oh my God, this has to be the best coffee I've ever had," I had honestly never tasted anything quite like it.

"I know right, I got it from a little place just near the ferry terminal," she told me excitedly.

"Do you know how Lizzy and Masen are?" I had to know, I was really worried about both of them.

"I haven't spoken to anyone this morning, but my mom called last night when she got home. Masen was fine after the flight and Edward was at the hospital about an hour or so getting him settled and meeting his new doctors. Lizzy woke up when they got her home and she was just so excited to be there and to see Angela that she didn't even mention Edward apparently. She was just going for her bath when mom left and she was spending the night in Edwards bed, how he will get her in her own tonight I have no idea," she sighed, I could see he worry in her eyes. I didn't envy Edward the task he had to face over the coming weeks and months.

"Alice, what time did you get out of bed this morning?" I asked resting my elbows on the counter and changing the subject, I had to know anyway, she must have been up before the birds.

"I got up at five, Jasper had to be in work early this morning, so we got the 6.10 ferry, I dropped Jasper off at the office, grabbed the coffee and came here, why?" she asked me in a tone that suggested that I was the crazy one.

"I was just wondering why _anyone_ who didn't have to be in work would even contemplate being up at this time,"

"Well I knew that you would need a hand today and as shopping is my expertise I thought that I would offer my services. Now drink up, get in the shower and we'll head out." she told me, leaving absolutely no room for argument.

"Yes, sir," I told her, but I really should have though about what I was saying, Alice smirked at me and I could just tell my the look in her eyes that I was in for it now.

"Oh, Bella, I think you are confusing me with my husband, do I really look like the _dominant_ one in our relationship?" She asked, I had to laugh, despite the churning in my stomach.

"Actually, Alice, yes you do," I told her honestly.

"Silly, Bella," she trilled, "It's _always _the quiet ones you have to watch out for," she told me, she was right of course, Jasper was a quiet guy, not the type of person you could ever imagine spanking it wife! "I know that you put two and two together on the plane yesterday, I was actually surprised that you did it so quickly, I thought that I was going to be dropping innuendo's for the next few months. Jasper told me that I could speak to you freely about this while we were still in Florida so can I be blunt with you?" She asked, I had a feeling that she would be even if I said no.

"Sure go ahead," I shrugged, trying to act nonchalant, I was telling myself that I had _wanted_ to talk to Alice about this, but it didn't do anything to settle the butterflies in my stomach.

"You like Edward right?" she insisted, now I could go one of two ways with an open question like that, firstly I could play dumb and take it as a general question about whether I though Edward was a nice person or not, or I could take it like she meant it – I was attracted to Edward. I decided to put my big girl panties on, rather than having us both going round in circles.

"Yeah, I kinda had a crush on him in high school, guess I never got over it," I whispered, Alice beamed at me.

"I knew it!" she yelped, before sobering herself, "Okay Bella, I'm gonna be honest with you, I _know_ that Edward like you too, but like Jasper, Edward is a Dom, he can't change that, regardless of how much he may want to be with you, being a Dom is not what he _does_ it's who he _is_ and I don't want you to be disappointed if he offers to try a vanilla relationship with you but fails miserably at it, that would be just be asking for two broken heart's" I was staring at Alice wide eyed – Did Edward actually think of me as more than a friend? "I know that wasn't what you were probably expecting to hear, but it is what it is," I realised that she had taken my shock as a response to her revelation about Edwards lifestyle.

"It's okay, Alice, I've known for over twelve years that Edward is a Dom, it was the fact that you think he would like to attempt a relationship with me that shocked the shit out of me." I laughed lightly

"You knew that?" she asked frowning at me, I laughed again, surprised at how easy I was finding having this unexpected conversation with Edwards sister, of all people.

"I did," I confirmed with a slight nod of my head.

"And you still want to try a regular relationship with him?" she asked confused.

"No, Alice – I want the type of relationship with Edward that you have with Jasper – I just don't know how to go about getting it." I admitted quietly, I was surprised that the smile that lit up Alice's face didn't break her jaw bone.

"Oh, Bella, we are gonna have _so _much fun with this," she chirped pulling out her blackberry.


	8. Chapter 8

**PLEASE READ!**

**I could think of a million and one excuses for not updating this story for over a year, but I won't bore you with them. What I will say is a big thank you to all those of you that have been PMing me and leaving reviews requesting updates. Karma is being updated and continued after so long because and **_**for**_** ALL of you that have been so supportive and insistant.**

**I hope that after all this time I have been able to keep to the flow of things, let me know if not and I will try harder.**

**Please let me know what you think. The good news is that even as I write this chapter 9 is begging to be written and I will start it as soon as I have posted this. **

**For those of you that are reading When the Dreaming Ends the next chapter for that will be written after I have got chapter 9 of Karma down. Another big thank you too all of you that have voted for WtDE in the Sun Flower Awards for the Best Vampire Story, I will send you the first couple of pages of the next chapter before I post it. For those of you that would like to vote the link is **http:/thesunflowerawards(dot)blogspot(dot)com **just replace (dot) with an actual dot haha.**

**Just FYI while I am writing such a long AN I have been looking all morning for ideas for Edwards new playroom and I hope you will like what I have in mind!**

**Love you all**

**Vik**

**x**

Chapter 8

"Seriously, Alice I don't think I need all this… stuff!" I said hesitantly, shopping with Alice was like fighting against a tornado, we had been at it for hours and it seemed like I was no closer to being released from the eye of the storm. Sofas, chairs, tables, glassware, crockery, pans, you name it and we had it, and my credit card hadn't seen the light of day!

"Of course you do, you're living in an empty shell!" she laughed as she waved her hands dismissively, "this is your chance to. . .make your mark. . .spark your inner artistic flair."

I frowned and rolled my eyes, I didn't _have_ an 'inner artistic flare', but never the less I obediently followed in her wake as she prattled on to the extremely patient personal shopper who was obviously earning a high commission.

I don't_ hate_ shopping but my mind was still whirling from our conversation this morning, after a whispered conversation on her mobile, Alice suddenly became mute on the subject of mine and Edward relationship and all but shoved me into the bedroom to dress and dragged me out of the apartment, talking nonstop about this bed and that sofa and she hasn't stopped since!

"What do you think?" Alice asked as she stood bouncing before an ornate wooden bed, I stopped just before I bumped into her and quickly apologized as she tisked me for not paying attention. I had to admit that the bed was beautiful, if not exactly what I had in mind, okay, not at all what I had in mind.

"Maybe something a little smaller?" I suggested as I tilted my head to view the monstrosity from a different angle, "I'll get lost in that!"

"Not tied to the posts you won't" she leant over and whispered in my ear, causing me to choke on my saliva and eye the personal shopper wearily to ensure she hadn't heard. Alice laughed and wiggled her eyebrows as she moved on to the next bed, while I stood still staring at the bed before me, now picturing Edward hovering over me as I lay bound and helpless. It suddenly didn't seem large enough!

"How about this one then?" she called and as I looked over to where she was now stood, she smirked at me, a knowing look in her eyes and I felt the need to remind her that it was her _brother_ that I was thinking about. It didn't take a genius to figure out why she had chosen this moment to bring up Edward, I just wished that she could have done it in the car or when we stopped for coffee, but _no_ she had to do it where there were too many prying ears able to listen into our conversation, where she knew that I couldn't take it any further. She had seemed so excited about it all this morning and I didn't understand why she was now so reluctant to broach the subject.

Shaking off that train of thought, I walked over to join her. Now _this_ bed was more to my liking, while still big, the detailed metal bars and flowing white organza curtains gave it a somehow softer feeling, it didn't seem as imposing as the wooden one.

"I like it," I told her honestly and before I could take another breath some silent communication had passed between Alice and the personal shopper. . .I really should find out her name. . .and the barcode was being scanned into the nifty handheld device she carried.

"Perfect, right well that just about does it for this shop, onwards and upward," she chirped and with another unseen communication the personal shopper was gone and I was following Alice out of the store, God knows where we were heading now!

As I'd watched Alice, _politely_ barking orders, giving direction, insisting on immediate delivery and setting her little black credit card on fire in the process, I'd come to the conclusion that_ this_ was her way of dictating one aspect of her own life. Being married to her Dom must seriously curb all of her other _quirks_. Alice is full of life, love and happiness – she'd have made a great hippy – so for her to be the submissive partner in her marriage must be more constricting for her than anyone else I could imagine – well maybe Rose, but I don't think that she has a submissive bone in her body!

"You still with me, Bella?" Alice suddenly chirped up, catching me unaware again and causing me to jump.

"Just about," I laughed, "No, but seriously, Alice, thank you for all this, I know, I know, no thanks are needed," I continued quickly just to stop her interrupting and telling me once again that this was her way of saying thank you for everything I had done for Masen and Lizzy, "But this would have taken me months to organize and save up for so please, let me say thank you." I insisted gripping one of her hands in mine, we had stopped beside her bright yellow Porsche that she had been about to climb into what I had stopped her.

"You're welcome," she said tearfully and smiling sadly I pulled her into my arms.

"How are you really, Alice? You buzz around from this point to that, making sure everyone _else_ is okay and has everything they need, what about you?" I whispered and pulled back to look into her eyes.

"It's just hard you know? We all tried to be strong for Edward, keep positive, reassure him that we would find them. Seeing him like that . . .he's my big brother, he's always been the strong one, able to carry the world on his shoulders. With everything he went through with that bitch before she even took the kids," she shrugged and wiped the lone tear that had fallen from her eyes, "He deserves some happiness, and that," she broke away from me, "Is where _you_ come in!" The smile was back on her face and she had completely deflected my question. I nodded and smiled.

"Hopefully" I laughed lightly. I could understand why she didn't want to talk about it, not only were we in the middle of a parking lot, and although we had become friends, we really didn't know each other _that_ well and if she was anything like me, she could be a very privet person.

"Of course you are. Come on, last stop then dinner," she bounced, her excitement for shopping returning and climbed into the car.

"Where are we?" I asked, concerned, as Alice pulled her car up behind what looked like a disused warehouse.

"This, my dear, is when the _real_ fun begins!" she sang. Reluctantly I once again followed her as she climbed out of the car and headed over to one of the large brick buildings. She tapped on the purple steel door that stood alone along the vast wall and bounced on her heals and we waited for the door to open.

"Alice, I'm not sure. . ." I started but stopped when the door was pulled open to reveal the most intimidating woman I had ever seen in my life! Holy fuck she was _huge_, if she introduced herself as _Helgar_ I wouldn't have been surprised!

"Hello, Alice," she greeted in heavily accented English and ushered us into the building, closing the metal door with a bang that gave me the sense of being locked behind prison bars.

"Zafrina," Alice replied. Her bouncing had stopped and I noticed her eyes were downcast and her hands were clasped behind her back. I looked between the two of them curiously for a moment before it suddenly clicked.

"Jasper called and said you'd be by with a new little pet, my, she is a lovely one," she crooned and gripped my chin in her large hand, tilting my face this way and that. My instinct was to pull away from her but as she had just confirmed my suspicion I held in place and following Alice's lead I lowered my eyes. "She's new to this?" she asked, addressing Alice again.

"Yes,ma'am," she replied quietly. Not used to hearing Alice like this, I wanted to look at her but resisted the temptation, I felt like this was some kind of test I had been thrown into and I had no desire to fail if that was the case.

"And she's for Edward?" Zafrina enquired. Before I could stop myself I looked up, startled that she would know that. Zafrinas's raised eyebrow and disapproving look had me quickly casting my eyes back down.

"Yes, ma'am," Alice replied again.

"Um, well let's see what we can do with her shall we? Follow me." She ordered and releasing my chin she turned and marched off down the hallway.

Shocked at these turn of events, I didn't move and it took Alice pulling on my arm to snap me out of my daze "Alice, what's going on?" I hissed.

"Nothing much, Zafrina is just gonna go over some basic rules with you, I thought it might be fun to throw Edward for a loop when you come for lunch on Sunday, you know? Don't worry." She attempted to reassure me, but it was useless, my heart was pounding, my palms were sweating and to be quite frank I was fucking terrified.

"And you didn't think that this was something I would like to know? Alice! I think we should just go!" I told her, panicked. She stopped walking and turned to me.

"You want to be with Edward, right?" she demanded.

"You know I do. . .but Alice. . ." I started only to be interrupted.

"Zafrina is one of the best, Jasper called in a favor for us, if you want to be with Edward then you are gonna have to show him that you can be who he needs you to be, if you can't do this then how are you gonna get through training with _him_? How are you gonna attend play parties and be on display? She's not going to _do_ anything to you. If you, no, _when_ you and Edward get together _he_ will conduct all of your training, I don't think he would like it if someone else got there before him – he can be a bit anal like that – Zafrina is just gonna be your instructor for the day, show you the basic positions and such," she whispered in a rush.

I was so not ready for this, but I nodded and moved when she tugged at my hand, rushing now to keep up with Zafrina. We entered a dimly lit room at the end of the hall, think black carpet covered the floor and the walls were painted a deep blood red. Zafrina stood in the centre of the room, her arms crossed at her chest and her foot tapping impatiently. I noticed for the first time what she was wearing, the long shiny black stiletto boots came to her mid thigh but there was still a good couple of inches between those and the bottom of her black skirt – if that's what you'd call it – her top half was just about covered in a tight black cosset that looked like it was made and the same material as her boots – intimidation wasn't the word!

Alice instantly dropped her eyes and taking her cue I followed suit, not wanting to look like a complete novice, although that was exactly what I was! Zafrina moved, and although I couldn't see her, I could hear the shuffling of her feet across the carpet and could almost feel her eyes burning into the back of my skull as she made her way behind us. My whole body was shaking and I could almost feel the adrenaline rushing through my veins and hear my heart pounding in my chest, but not once did I question whether Edward was worth it!

"Well done, pet," Zafrina purred as she stroked her hand down my hair. I suppressed a shiver that wanted to break free at the unfamiliar and unwelcome touch and held back the tears that bit at the corners of my eyes. This was all so sudden and overwhelming that I didn't know whether it was the reality that this was really happening, my anger at Alice for putting me in this situation or the fear that Zafrina was instilling with her deliberate intimidation, that was provoking my tear ducts, but what I did know was that I didn't like it! I didn't like it at all!

EPOV

The inside of my cheek pressed against my teeth, first on one side, then on the other before being dragged back towards my ears, stretching my lips tightly across my face and being held there for a moment or two, then the tension slacked off and they were pulled forward pushing my mouth into some sort of strange fishy pout. The giggle that came from above me had me fighting to keep my face relaxed and eyes closed so that Lizzy could continue her details exploration of my face. I'd been awake a good few minutes, the shifting of Lizzy's weight as she climbed up to sit on my chest - narrowly missing my groin with her tiny foot as she went – was what brought me back to consciousness and she'd been prodding and pocking at me since. Her tiny fingers tugging at my ears, stroking over my forehead and eyes, running through my hair and now pushing at my cheeks, seemed to be attempting to memorize my face, it was such a tender moment that I was loathed to open my eyes and disturb her, but when she pulled at my eyelid and I got the first glimpse at her smiling, giggling face it became all too much and to stop the tears from forming in my eyes I quickly shot up, grabbing her small body and throwing her on the bed beside me, tickling her stomach and growling as I gently scratched her face with my two day old stubble.

"D…d…daaaaddddyyy! S…s..stop, s…s….stooop!" she gasped out between her heartwarming giggles. I pulled back, a smiled so wide on my face that I thought my lips would crack, and looked down at the beautiful princess still laughing on my bed.

"Good morning, my little angle," I smiled as I covered her face in kisses, earning me more of her sweet laughter.

"G'mowing, daddy! I's been twing to wake you up for aaages!" she exclaimed, "Angewa pwomised to make pancakes for bweckfast today."

"Did she now?" I asked as I pulled back and rolled onto my side, resting my head on my hand as I looked down at her. She still had lines on her face where the pillow had pressed against her cheek as she slept, a trail of what looked like crusty drool at the side of her mouth and her copper hair looked like a haystack, but she was still the most beautiful sight I had ever seen. "Well now, we can't let Angela's pancakes go to waste can we?"

"No, we have to get up, then we can have pancakes an we have to go see Masen an then we couwd go to the pawk an then go swimming, can Masen cowm too? He's not been swimming afore! He can pway wif my rings and my bawl, I can teach him to swim. We can feed the duckies too, do you think they like pancakes? We couwd take sowm of the ones Angwa makes!" If there was ever any doubt that Lizzy was related to Alice it was washed away at times like this when she talked non-stop.

"Masen can't come swimming with us just yet, Princess, but he'll be able to soon and it is very nice of you to offer to share your toys with him. I'm not sure if the ducks will like pancakes but I'm sure we can find some bread to take to the park with us, then we can come home and go swimming this afternoon, okay?" I asked, willing to do whatever her little heart desired before I had to go back to work on Monday. My tears were still threatening to fall as I looked down at her, it was only just over a week ago that I thought that I would never have this time with her again. But this was the first morning of the rest of our lives and I was going to make the most of it.

"But we'll go see him at the hostibul, won't we, daddy?" she pleaded, her eyes now bright with her own tears.

"Of course, Princess!" I promised, "I can hear Angela downstairs, why don't you go down and see if she's making your pancakes while daddy has a quick shower?" I suggested.

"Okay!" she exclaimed, jumping up and shuffling off the bed. She ran out of the room without a backwards glance and I was just lying back down when she came running back into the room, jumped on the bed and placed a huge sloppy kiss on my cheek.

"Wuve you, daddy!" she sang and tried to choke the life out of me as she wrapped her tiny arms around my neck.

"I love you too, Princess," I choked out through the lump that had formed in my throat and pulled her into my arms, holding on for dear life. All too soon she wiggled away from me and ran back out of the room.

Sighing I covered my eyes with my forearm and breathed deep. Trying to push away the ache in my chest and the sting in my eyes I turned my thoughts to the night before. Once Lizzy was asleep I had taken the little silver key out of my bedside table and slowly made my way through my dressing room to the locked door at the back of it, a door that hadn't been opened in a very long time. Turning the key in the lock I took a deep breath before opening and stepping through.

The dim lights illuminated as I walked into the room and I could see the thin layer of dust that covered all of the surfaces, from the leather of the whipping bench to the white oak of the cupboards and draws that stood against the deep red walls. I eyed the room critically trying to picture Bella in there, trying to see it from her point of view and I knew then that it all had to go. The large wooden bed, the cabinets, the black carpet, the red walls, benches, whips, toys. . .everything! It all had to go! If Bella wanted me, wanted this – and I had decided that I would stop at nothing to get her – then this had to be a fresh start, the whole room somehow felt. . .seedy and cheap! It needed to be classy and elegantly erotic. I couldn't take Bella, train her, worship her, use her, on or with items that were tainted with my past, she deserved the best and I planned on giving my all to get it for her.

I groaned, the ache in my heart had now moved south to my dick and it was demanding attention that it had been denied for so long and my palm suddenly itched with the need to feel the sting that could only come from the great pleasure of turning an ass a bright shade of pink! It wasn't what I needed, what my body craved, but with a another groan I rose from the bed and made my way into the bathroom for a little self-loving, the tent in my sleep pants leading the way to the shower.

After turning the spray on full power and the heat up to a just beatable temperature, I stripped down and looked at myself in the mirror. For being almost thirty one, even I had to admit that I didn't look half bad. I had always taken pride in my appearance and my lifestyle demanded that I keep in shape, the six pack that I had acquired at an early age was more defined than ever, my shoulders were broad and thick set, my arms and legs muscular and defined but not overly so and my penis stood to attention in all of its eight and a half inch glory, the circumference at its base almost equal to its length and it was still demanding attention.

My reflection was becoming blurred with the steam that was filling the room so I abandoned my self evaluation and quickly jumped into the shower. The heavy torrent of water rained down from the three foot square head above, like a tropical downpour and the side jets hammered against my aching muscles and breathing a sigh of relief I squirted a generous helping of shower gel into the palm of my hand and fisted my throbbing dick. A long moan formed in the back of my throat as I ran man hand slowly up my length, twisting it over the head before dragging it back down again. Images of Bella lay prone across my bed, infiltrated my mind and my hand picked up the pace as I imagined entering her for the first time and I tightened my grip knowing how tight she would be, her form was so slight now that I could almost feel her body being pushed up the bed with the force of my thrusts. I didn't go easy on myself, pumping my dick hard and fast, my hips thrusting in time with my movements, my head resting on the arm that was leaning on the wall before me, my palm was slick with the shower gel I'd used and warm from the hot water raining down on me. It didn't take much for my mind to imagine it was Bella hot wet pussy that was surrounding me so tightly and my lower stomach, dick and balls all tingled with my pending release. I thrust my hips faster and griped my dick harder as I continued to pump my hand, twisting and pulling, thrusting and retracting.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," I whispered and called Bella's name like a prayer as my ass muscles clenched, my back arched and my seed shot out of the end of my dick. White stars formed behind my closed eyelids and my whole body tensed and contracted as my orgasm washed over me. I slowed my strokes, bringing myself down slowly, not wanting to let go of the feeling and slumped forward against my arm that was now holding me up.

With the relief of the orgasm came the grief and guilt I had been trying all morning to suppress, my brief moment of pleasure in the imagined arms of Bella Swan transformed in to the gut wrenching sobs I had been trying to hold at bay and I slid down the wall and sat huddled under the spray, my fat salty tears mixing with the water that ran down the drain.


	9. Chapter 9

**As promised here is chapter 9. I've had 37 reviews for the last chapter which is amazing! So a big thank you to all those of you who have reviewed, like I said before, it was all of the reviews and PM's that I got over the last few months that started me off again and gave me the desire to pick Karma up again. **

**I really have the bug for it BUT reviews are my EDWARD they keep me going and give me the inspireation. For those of you who commented on Alice it is you who have inspired this chapter, I never intended it to go this way but I was running off your comments as I wrote so PLEASE the more reviews = more inspiration = more ideas = more chapters so keep them coming...how many will we get this time? It's more your story than mine now so ...well done!**

**vik x**

Chapter 9

I looked away from the mirror and over at Alice in question, as she stood leaning against my bedroom door eyeing me critically. The ivory corset that she had me bound into, although seriously restricting my breathing, had enhanced my slim form, my tiny waist, I'm sure, had been reduced a further inch or two, my ample breast were being held high, my hips were more defined and my posture was straighter. Despite that fact that I doubted I would be able to eat any of the meal that Esme was preparing for us, due to both the corset and the swarm of butterflies in my stomach, for the first time in my life I felt sexy.

Covering the corset, suspenders and skin coloured stockings was a beautiful thick cream woollen dress, almost angora in style, with a thin brown belt at the waist that matched perfectly to the brown suede half ankle stiletto boots I was wearing.

According to Alice, despite the fact that I was fully clothed, to the _trained_ eye, it was perfectly obvious that I was wearing the corset. In other words, Edward would know!

"So, what do you think?" I asked when Alice still hadn't said anything.

"I think," she said pushing off the wall and walking over to me, running her hands through my neatly tussled hair, messing it up in the process, "That it's a bloody good job my dad's a doctor!"

"What, in case I pass out through lack of oxygen?" I asked laughing.

"No, you dope! For when Edward has a heart attack of course!" she cackled. "Now you remember what Zafrina said? Make eye contact with him but keep it breif, lowering your eyes as you talk to him is a sign of respect, Jasper knows what 's going on and he will guide you and remind you if you forget anything. Jasper will be in role but Edward won't be at first, if he picks up on what is going on and is responsive you will hopefully notice a subtle change in him hopefully Edward will pick up on Jaspers mood and it won't take long." She continued, "Now, we don't want to make anything too obvious to anyone, Edward included, he's not your Dom yet, so while you have to be respectful he has to be the one to pick up on your _subtle_ hints, it's not your place to force the issue with him. Try not to look intimidated, be your usual open and friendly self with everyone else. What else? Oh yeah, now your hands need to be clasped in front of you, not folded or on your hips, put them behind you when you can, it will arch your back and push your breast like you are waiting for his inspection. If you're unsure just look to me or Jasper and we'll help you, okay?" I just nodded, my mouth suddenly too dry to speak. "You'll be fine!"

If you hadn't already guessed, it's Sunday and we are due to have lunch at the Cullen's place on Bainbridge Island in two hours. My Thursday afternoon spent with Zafrina had been both terrifying and exhilarating. After her initial assessment of me – that still turned my stomach – she had moved on to work with Alice and I together.

Jasper had given them both permission to work together for my introduction into what would be expected of me. We had gone through etiquette, positions such as the standard waiting positions, inspection positions, attention positions, serving food and drink, how to rise gracefully – not an easy one for me – and she had talked about the base relationship between a Dominant and submissive. I had left with an arm full of books and list of web addresses to look at and I spent most of Friday and Saturday doing just that. A lot of the information I had read before but most of it was new.

Jasper was waiting for us in the lounge, so after a quick swipe of lips gloss I grabbed my bag off the bed, shoving my gloss and phone inside and followed Alice out of my bedroom closing the door behind me. Jasper stood as we entered the room and Alice immediately stopped walking, lowered her eyes and clasped her hands behind her back. I suddenly felt uncomfortable in my own home and completely unsure of where to look, a quick glance at Jasper though, had me breathing a sigh of relief. Catching my eye he winked and smirked and then with a rise in his eyebrow he looked from Alice to me to the floor and then back to me. His instruction was subtle but perfectly clear and I lowered my eyes in response.

"Well, ladies, shall we?" he asked, but without waiting for a response he walked to the door, opened it and stood aside for Alice and I to pass. Grabbing my new wool coat – courtesy of Alice in the form or a large delivery of clothes that arrived at my door yesterday afternoon – I followed them both out of my apartment, making sure that the door was locked behind me.

Both Alice and Jasper were silent on the way over to Bainbridge Island and unfortunately for me, that gave me too much time to think about what I was getting myself into. I knew that I wanted this, wanted Edward, with my entire being, it was the thought that, given the chance, I would be giving control of that being to the man in question. It was something that I had been thinking about, fantasizing about for so many years, but after the uncomfortable afternoon with Zafrina and the time reading the books, example contracts and web sites she had given me, doubts that I could actually do this, give control of my body, my life, my everything to him for his pleasure and mine, were creeping in.

From what I had read these feelings were normal, it would take time, practice and a hell of a lot of patience – from Edwards perspective – for me to feel comfortable and able to offer him my complete submission and even longer still for his needs, wants and desires, to be my needs, my wants and my desires, for me to _need_ to please him, for my contentment to be solely dependent on his.

"Are you alright, darlin?" Jasper suddenly broke the long silence and I met his eyes in the mirror for a brief moment before breaking the contact and looking down into my lap.

"Yeah, just got a lot on my mind, you know?" I shrugged.

"Edwards a fucking fantastic Dom, sugar, a kind one, you'd have to go a long way to find better, I've been at this as long as he has but I still turn to him for advice now and again," he glanced at Alice as he said this and she turned to smile at him. I wondered how uncomfortable that would be for Edward, giving his best friend advice knowing that it would be used on his baby sister. It can be easy, but it definitely shows a certain detachment and business-like approach.

"He's a great guy," I offered weakly, he was more than a great guy, in Japsers words he was a fucking fantastic guy, and that reminder eased my nerves somewhat.

"Thanks, Jasper!" I told him honestly. He smiled and winked at me as he had in the apartment.

We disembarked the ferry and travelled quickly along the winding roads of Bainbridge. The further we travelled the further back from the road and larger the houses became. Through a break in the trees I could see the waters of the Sound and the Olympic mountains on the horizon, it made me think of Charlie and my need to call him to let him know that I had got here safety and to make arrangements to visit him and Sue soon.

All too soon we had approached a pair of large iron gates, Jasper had entered a key code and we were driving towards one of the biggest houses I think I had ever seen. It was four stories high and made almost completely of glass and warm oak, it was not what I imagined at all. I expected something more presidential, white brick with tall pillars and roaming ivy. It was undeniably a beautiful work of art.

"Wow," I muttered. Alice looked at Jasper and at his soft nod she turned to me.

"It's great isn't it? Mom designed it a year or two before we moved back this way from Forks. She said that she needed something to let in as much sunlight as possible," she smiled causing me to smile back. I wasn't sure how comfortable I was with a silent Alice, it was strange and. . .just wrong!

"Yeah, it beautiful," I admitted.

Jasper stopped the car behind a sleek silver Volvo SUV and climbed out, opening first my then Alice's door. I thanked him and climbed out, making sure not to flash my suspenders as I rose to my feet but before I had a chance to right myself completely, the front door flew open and a streak of bronze ringlets shot down the steps and wrapped itself around my legs.

"Bewwa, you're here!" Lizzy exclaimed as she clung to me. I detached her arms and crouched down to her level wrapping my arms around her.

"Hey, pumpkin! I missed you," I said quietly in her ear as she buried her head in my shoulder.

"I's missed you too, Bewwa. Masen misses you too. I's been to the hosdibul wive daddy every day, and did you know that awl his tubs are gone now? Doctor Grrry said he can cowm howm soon too!" she told me excitedly. Of course I already knew all of this, I had spoken to Edward on the phone yesterday for an update and he told me everything Doctor _Gerandi_ had said.

"He is? Wow that's great, I bet you can't wait to show him his new home, hey? And all your toys?" I said enthusiastically. Lizzy in all of her three year old glory, had push my nerves away and my complete attention was on her as she prattled on about all of the things that she had done with her daddy this week, and all of the things that she was going to do with Angela next week.

I didn't imagine for one minute that tomorrow would go as smoothly as she was painting it now. Edward had admitted to me yesterday that he was having trouble with her separation anxiety at night. He had managed to get her to sleep in her own bed, sitting with her until she fell asleep, but she was waking constantly through the night, plagued with nightmares and night terrors. He sounded exhausted when I had spoken to him.

"Are you not gonna let Bella come inside where it's warm, baby? And say hello to Aunt Alice and Uncle Jasper?" Came the velvety voice that could belong to no-one except this little girls daddy.

I was suddenly unsure of what I was supposed to do, it felt rude not to meet his eyes when speaking to him and I began to panic.

"You not gonna say hello to me, sugar?" Jasper asked crouching down next to Lizzy and me. I looked up at him, wide eyed and terrified. "You'll be fine, relax, breathe, be yourself, make brief eye contact then lower your eyes to speak," he instructed quickly and very quietly. I nodded infinitesimally, closed my eyes briefly and taking a deep breath rose to my feet, leaving Jasper trying to keep up with what Lizzy was now filling him in on.

The breath I had just taken turned out to be a useless endeavour as Edward stole it from me as soon as I looked at him. Yes I could still see how tired he was, but the dark circles below his eyes had faded, the stubble that had covered his face during our time at the hospital in Florida was gone, he was wearing a grey shirt, un-tucked with the top two buttons undone, and dark washed jeans, both accenting his muscular form.

"Hey," I breathed, all the tension leaving my body at the sight of him. The only problem was that I was unable to pull my eyes from his, I just couldn't do it! He smiled and I think I might have peed myself a little.

"Hey, how are you?" he asked just as quietly.

"I'm good, how are you? How's Masen?" I asked still maintaining eye contact, I heard Alice clear her throat and dropped my eyes quickly, it almost caused me pain to do so, everything was always in his beautiful green eyes.

"We're both good, he should be home on Friday," I just couldn't stop myself from looking back up at him as he spoke and I knew that this was never going to work. "Shall we go in?" he asked.

"Oh, yeah, of course," I stuttered while mentally chastising myself for failing already. Edward gestured for me to walk ahead of him and Alice and Jasper followed, Jasper carrying Lizzy in his arms as she continued to talk. I suppose he would be used to it, living will Alice and all!

Walking through the door, Edward helped me take off my coat and draped it over a seat that stood to the side of the hallway. Jasper and Alice had gone in ahead of us and placing his hand at the small of my back Edward guided my up the stairs.

EPOV

Bella removed her coat revealing a cream coloured wool dress that hugged her form to perfection. Somehow she looked like she'd lost weight since I last saw her just four days ago, no that wasn't right, she hadn't lost weight, she was holding herself differently, more upright I think! Attempting to pull myself together I gestured for her to precede me up the stairs and when my desperate need to make contact with her had me placing my hand on the small of her back, the reason for her change in posture hit me like a bolt of lightning! Jesus, Mary and Joseph, she was wearing a corset! The ties at the back, invisible to the naked eye, could be felt distinctly through the fabric of her dress, and the ridged structure of the garment was firm and un-yielding beneath my finger-tips.

Why on God's green earth was Bella. . .Bella of all people. . .wearing a corset to Sunday lunch at my parent's house? My hard on was instantaneous, and extremely painful against the unforgiving fabric of my jeans and as I hissed in pain Bella turned to face me.

"You okay?" she asked, a frown on her beautiful face.

"Yeah, fine," I replied raising my eyes to hers. She was positioned a couple of steps up from me and her breasts, her magnificent breasts, pushed high and tight by the bone structure in her corset, were right at my eye level. It was only years and years of training to become the Dom that I was, that kept me from losing all composure. As my eyes reached hers she smiled and then looked down at her hands that were clasped in front of her. That was twice she had done that in the last five minutes and I wondered what was wrong.

With another small smile and an even smaller glance into my eyes, she turned and headed up the stairs. I kept my hands to myself this time and willed my hard on into submission before I had to face my family – including my three year old daughter.

"Bella, I'm so glad you could make it, you look wonderful, my dear," my mother exclaimed greeting Bella with a tight embrace which Bella returned wholeheartedly, next up was my dad who lovingly gripped her shoulders and kissed her forehead. Rose and Emmett hadn't arrived yet so with the formal greeting out a way we each took various seats around the lounge. When Alice discretely folded herself down onto the floor at Jaspers side and lovingly placed her head in his lap it was thankfully clear only to me that they were still _playing,_ to anyone else in the room the position she had adopted simply looked like a loving gesture as Jasper sat playing with her spiky hair.

Bella also chose to sit on the floor, but _she_ was sat looking through Lizzy's colouring books and praising my daughter's artistic abilities. Watching her, it was easy to see why she had chosen to go into childcare, she was a natural with children. Lizzy had taken to her straight away despite the trauma she had just endured, and they had formed a fast friendship.

"So, Bella, how's the apartment, Alice mentioned that you had settled in okay," My dad asked as he took his seat across from where I was sitting watching Bella and Lizzy.

"It's fantastic," she told him enthusiastically "The views are amazing and Alice has kindly helped me furnish it, she's got it looking great, so much better than I ever could!" She turned and smiled at Alice, who offered her a wide smile in return.

"And when do you start work?" My mom enquired as she perched on the arm of my dad's chair. I smiled as he wrapped his arm around her waist. A love like they have just never dies!

"A week on Monday, I need to nip in on Friday to complete a couple of forms and such though," she shrugged. "I'm really looking forward to it,"

"That's wonderful, sweetheart," my mom told her "You'll love the building, it bright and open and as well as the children's play area, there are some fantastic walks around the grounds. Lizzy will be going back soon too won't she honey?" she asked looking at me. I breathed a sigh of relief! Not once had I considered that Bella would be working at Lizzy's day care. I had been panicking about sending her back, wondering how she was going to manage the separation. She hadn't been there long before she was taken and it was _that _place she was taken from. Now realising that Bella would be there with her I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off my shoulders.

"Yeah she will," I smiled.

My mom smiled back as she rose and walked towards the kitchen, giving Bella's shoulder a light squeeze on her way past, "If you'll excuse me for a moment, I need to check on the chicken. Can I get anyone a drink while I'm there?"

"I'll give you a hand with the drinks," Bella offered rising gracefully to her feet, Lizzy was occupied colouring and barley noticed that Bella had stood. "What would everyone like?" she asked and turned to face me expectantly but once again lowered her eyes.

"Bella, you're a guest, you sit down I'll give my mom a hand," I offered and went to stand when she stopped me.

"No! I mean. . .of course if that's what you want to do . . .I mean, only if it plea. . .shit. . .sorry!" she clamped her hand over her face and looked at Alice helplessly. I'd never seen Bella like this before and I didn't know whether to laugh or pull her into a hug to try and comfort her.

"Edward, you stay and play with Lizzy or talk with the guys, I'll help mom and Bella," Alice quickly came to Bella's rescue and rose from the ground and taking hold of Bella hand she pulled her from the room.

"Well, that was interesting," my dad laughed, "What's wrong with Bella?" I shrugged and looked over at Jazz to see if he could shed any light on Bella's behaviour, he had after all been with her and Alice most of the day. He smirked at me and then turned to face my dad.

"She's been like this all morning, quiet and a tad. . ._submissive. . ._" he glance at me from the corner of his eye, "She has spent a lot of time with Alice this week, shopping and. . ._things. . ._"another glance, "The way Alice can talk she's probably on an _information_ overload. She's in a new town, a new _scene_, meeting new people, starting a new _position_ soon, realising all her _desires,_ things she _wants_ and _needs_. Everyone has their _limits, _she probably just needed a moment to get _control_ over her emotions and not let all this upheaval _dominate_ her mind"

I listened, incredulously, as Jasper spoke. Like a true lawyer he supplied all of the information needed but was only obvious and relevant to those who spoke the language. _Submissive, information, scene, position, desires, wants, needs, limits, control, dominate. _The words he had, in a very subtle way, emphasized, ran on repeat in my mind.

I missed my dad's response to what Jasper had said, there was no need to worry that he would pick up on the message that I was almost positive Jasper was trying to relay, he had no idea about our lifestyle and what had Jasper said that wasn't true to Bella's life? I did see when my dad lifted Lizzy and excused them both from the room, slipping through the glass doors into the garden, and after watching them go I turned to Jasper with a hard stare.

"Is there a reason you chose _this_ time to inform me that Bella is a submissive? How long have you known? Why didn't you tell me? Do you have _any_ idea what I have been going through trying to work out how to approach her with this?" I hissed at him.

"Woah, chillax! Firstly Bella is not a submissive. . .yet" he rose and moved to sit on the table at the side of me, "I only found out for sure on Thursday morning, that she _wants_ to be, when Alice called me from Bella's apartment asking me to set up a meeting with Zafrina for the two of them for Thursday afternoon,"

"Zafrina? You arranged for Bella to meet up with Zafrina? Is she looking for a female Domme?" I frowned, my heart sinking into my stomach.

"Um, no! Look, Alice has already been punished for this, so keep your cool and stay out of it okay?" He wasn't really asking and my hackles rose, the alpha male and the big brother in me wanting to state my dominance over him – even if he was my best friend and brother! Grinding my teeth I nodded for him to continue. "Bella noticed Alice's collar on the flight back to Seattle, she – Alice – had already asked me when we were in Florida for permission to speak openly about our lifestyle to Bella, I told her that she could only if Bella stated an interest. Well Bella apparently cottoned on to what the necklace was about, almost immediately," I nodded, I had noticed that as well, "When Alice stopped by to take Bella shopping on Thursday morning a comment was allegedly made by Bella and Alice ran with it. Turns out, she likes you and had known about your lifestyle choice before you even graduated Forks high!" he continued

"She was only fifteen, and _nobody_ knew – well apart from Tanya – how the hell did she find out?" I whisper-shouted.

"That, you will have to find out from Bella, I have no Idea. Anyway, so Alice tells her that you will most likely never enter a vanilla relationship, to which Bella responded that she didn't want a vanilla relationship with you, she wanted the kind of relationship that Alice and I have," he quirked his brow and smirked at me. I just stared at him wide-eyed. "So Alice, in all her wisdom, called me to set up the meeting, for Bella to go over a few basics with Zafrina, which I did, what I didn't know until I got a pissed off phone call from Zafrina was that Alice failed to tell Bella where she was taking her and why. Zafrina said that Bella was terrified and totally un-prepared for what was happening."

As he spoke my anger rose, by the time he finished I was fucking livid and jumped up off the couch to pace across the room. How dare she? Alice, of all people should know better! You _never_ put a sub in such a vulnerable position and expect them to just role with it. Even an experienced sub would struggle with that. For someone like Bella, someone just _thinking_ about entering the lifestyle it must have scared the living shit out of her, Zafrina scares the living shit out of _me_ most of the time! No wonder Bella was so jumpy!

"So what now? Why didn't you wait until now to tell me about all this?" I demanded, Jasper sighed and leant back on the table.

"When Alice called me on Thursday morning, she made it sound like Bella was on board with all of this secrecy, that she didn't want to you know and I promised not to say anything. Seeing her for the first time today, trying to find her footing, not knowing how to act, the constant pleading with her eyes for help! It's a crock of bull! This is all Alice going off into la la land, trying to spice things up a bit. What Bella needs is for you to know, for you to either encourage her and talk to her, or tell her that you're not interested. All this mind game shit is fucked up." As he talked his outwards appearance was calm, relaxed, casual, but knowing him for so long, I could see the storm brewing behind his eyes. Yes, Alice had apparently already been punished for Thursday's stunt but add to that the game she's pulling Bella into and let's just say that I wouldn't want to be my little sister tonight. This was why they were still _playing_, they normally stop before we arrive at my parents for lunch. Jasper wanted to assess what was going on with Bella.

What I failed to understand was, why Alice hadn't just come to me, or asked Jasper to come to me and explain what was going on. Both of them were aware that I had feeling for Bella, she apparently told Alice that she has feelings for me, surely I had dealt with enough mind games and fuckery at the hands on Tanya to last me a fucking life time, I didn't need it from my sister as well!

"Do me a favour and tell Alice to stay the fuck away from me, not to talk to me, smile at me or approach me in any way! What she has done to Bella is inexcusable! She may not be my sub _yet_ but she made it known that she wanted to be and Alice knew full well that I wanted the same. Any respectable, experienced, God damn fucking _ethical_ sub would have done was pass the information over to her Master for Him to deal with as He saw fit, not string a bunch of lies, pushing her whims and desires onto an inexperienced, naïve, potential sub! If she has harmed Bella or my chances for a relationship with her in _any _way, I swear to God she'll be sorry! _You_ should be ashamed of her, I certainly am!" I didn't once raise my voice, but the ice behind my words could have frozen molten lava and without looking back I walked out of the room, following the path my dad had taken with Lizzy. I needed to get out of the house, it was all just too much!

As I told Jasper, Bella might not be my sub _yet_ but I wanted her to be, I wanted it so badly I could taste it and in her current state of mind the last thing she needed to see was _me_ in angry Dom mode. I needed to clear my head and get in the zone before I approached her. Not an easy task when your blood is boiling.


End file.
